The Way He Looked At Her

He is gone..

  I got up from the bed. Wiping my tears off that were still on me and looked back at Jax. I kissed his lips hard and long then kissed his head hard and long. " I love you my biker. " I said as I let some tears go down and left the room backwards. Knowing this was it for Jackson Teller being in my life anymore. I closed the door and looked as I saw Gemma. She had her arms out and of course I get in them without a second of thinking. I needed someone that was really close to him and no one knew him better than his mother. I hugged her tight as she did the same. She then let go as I did the same. She had her hand in my hair. She knows I love him. Present tense like I always will. " I'm so sorry baby. " She said still putting my hair behind my ear. " I should be the one saying saying sorry to you. He was your son. " I said as I was trying not to lose it. I saw a few tears coming from her eyes. She looked as upset as I was when I found out. She had make up going down her face. She looked so sad. Like of course she looked sad but I mean like she something to do with this. She couldn't have. She was in the office the whole time it happened. It wouldn't make sense. I swear unless she payed the guy to kill him. Then the one who wrote the letter with directions was. Gemma. She saw the reaction on my face then looked at me confused as I looked at her and said, " Do you have any idea what really happened? Who sent that guy to the club? I feel like your the one who did it and didn't care to see your own son die knowing it was going to happen. Your going to pay for what you did." I said as I look at her with so much anger. When she saw my face she went and ran out of the buliding. When I saw her run I went and ran towards her as I had so much anger. As What I wanted to do is kill her. What I was going to do was kill her. I was going and I was willing to kill her. I was going to kill Gemma Morrow. I ran and saw her in the car trying to run away. I ran after her. But I realized. That Jax wouldn't want me to do this at least not yet. He wouldn't want me to do this when I don't know what I'm doing. But I will get her. I will when she least aspects it. I just want to go home. Maybe just sit on the roof where Jax and I would sit and think. I cried then looked at the road and drove away. Going to my house where I would have to deal with my drunk mother.