I Want What I Can't Have

History Repeats Itself

After categorically telling Johanna what not to do I was sure everything was going to be okay. She called me shortly after her tour had ended and we had a nice catch up. That was until Snow came up in conversation, he wanted to see Johanna tomorrow. I was of course sceptical and worried for her, but she told me she'd be fine. To be honest, I really doubted it. No one's fine with Snow.

***
Later that day I received a phone call.

"Hello?" I said.

"I need you to come to seven now," Johanna's voice said suddenly.

I hung up and rushed out of the door, catching the train just in time. District Seven wasn't a massive trip to make thankfully so I was there in no time. The fragrant smell of pine came to me making me feel warm and fuzzy. I made my way to Victor's Village, all of a sudden realising I didn't know who's house was who's. I knocked on a random door, praying it was Johanna's home. To my embarrassment it was a middle aged man that stepped out of the door.

"What do you want?" He asked, clearly drunk.

"Where does Johanna live?" I replied.

"Uh, that bitch, three doors down my love," he said, walking back in, slamming the door behind him.

I quickly walked down and knocked on the door.

"Come in," a small voice came.

I slowly pushed the wooden door open to find Johanna on the floor, mascara running down her puffy face.

"Oh Johanna," I murmured, kneeling down beside her, "can you stand up?"

"No," she replied.

"Can you try?" I asked softly.

She nodded, clinging into my arms for support, digging her sharp nails into my skin, leaving small red marks. Not that I cared. I helped the poor girl onto the sofa and went and made a cup of tea for us both.

"What happened?" I asked, fearing I already knew.

"I didn't listen to you," she said quietly, "he killed them all."

"Johanna..." I murmured, bringing her into my arms, "I'm so sorry."

"I don't know what to do with myself," she whispered.

"How about you come and stay with me for a bit," I suggested, "it might get your mind off of all of this and I can look after you."

She nodded, burying herself into me further. I felt as she shakily sobbed in my arms and I rubbed her back, for comfort and told her it would all be alright. She eventually exhausted herself into sleep and I soon let my eyes close to join her.

***
Within the next few days, I helped Johanna pack for leaving. But before we left from eight I though it'd be better if we stayed somewhere else.

"Hello?" Finnick said, down the phone.

"It's me," I said.

"I'm sorry you'll have to book an appointment after the many ladies of the Capitol," he said, in his serious tone.

"Finnick," I laughed.

"What do you need," he said.

"Can me and Johanna stay with you for a bit. Snow did what he did to me to her and I would take her back to eight, but four it prettier and more calming," I explained.

"Yeah of course, come over today," he said.

"Thank you so much, we'll see you soon," I said, putting the phone down.

I walked back to the bedroom where Johanna was still packing things.

"Change of plans, we're going to district four," I smiled.

"Okay," she murmured.

"It's more relaxing there," I explained.

"What if I want to come back?" She asked, sheepishly.

"Then we'll come back," I said, "whatever makes you feel good."

***
We boarded the train when she was ready. On the ride we discussed many things. She told me about her family, her three older brothers, her mum and dad. Then she talked about seven a lot. How she'd gotten into lumber, what kind of things they did, how their system worked. She told her about her favourite tree that she used to climb as a child, that her family owned. Her life sounded so beautiful and Snow crushed it. I could feel the hatred in her, burning every second we talked.

Once we had arrived we walked up to Victor's Village.

"It's so fresh," she smiled, inhaling the sea air.

I nodded, "and it's so pretty."

"Which one is it?" She asked.

"The one with the seashells," I said walking up to it, knocking on the door.

"Flaire," Finnick smiled giving me a hug.

"Hello," I said.

"Johanna," Finnick said, sadly, bringing her into his arms, "I'm so sorry."

"Thank you," she said, her voice shaking.

"Let's go in," he said, leading us in, taking all the bags we had, "I wasn't sure if you two wanted to share a room or be in separate."

I glanced at Johanna and she answered, "separate."

Finnick nodded as we followed him up his staircase. At the top, there were three massive bedrooms. The end one was clearly Finnick's. Seashells, dolphins and a picture frame of Annie on the bedside table.

"Take your pick," he smiled, "I'm making tea."

"You choose," I said to Johanna.

She walked into the room decorated with plants and little lights and said, "I like this one."

"Do you need help unpacking?" I asked.

She shook her head as I walked out.

"I'm next door if you need me," I smiled, walking into the room I had used before. When I couldn't use Finnick's at night because he was with a client, I'd sleep in this room and of course the client didn't know.

***
Once I had coaxed Johanna out of the room we went downstairs to join Finnick.

"Are you two hungry?" He asked, "It's a long journey."

"No I'm alright," Johanna said, "thanks."

"Yeah I'm fine," I smiled.

"Anyone fancy a drink then?" he offered.

"I don't think that's a good idea," I warned.

"Come on Flaire," he said.

"I'll have one," Johanna piped up.

"See?" Finnick smiled.

I rolled my eyes and guided Johanna into the living room as Finnick clanked around with the three glasses, making me and Johanna giggle for no reason. God we hadn't even had a drink yet! Finnick came back in with the red wine.

"You know this stains?" I said.

He shrugged handing me a glass, "to us," he toasted.

"To us," me and Johanna laughed back.

***
Yeah...we got drunk and I remember nothing.

***
Johanna 🥺💔
They're all together now though 🙂
Rosabella xx