I Want What I Can't Have

No No No No No

From what I heard from Johanna there was no uprisings in 7 and from Finnick none in 4, meaning they were both currently safe. I was flooded with a sense of relief. As long as they were okay I was convinced I would be. Snow had maybe ruined some of our lives but there was a chance we could live the rest in peace. I didn't want to give that peace up but I definitely didn't want to give my friends up.

I glanced at the clock and realised Snow would be giving his speech about the 75th Hunger Games being a Quarter Quell right about now and a horrible curiosity gnawed at my insides so I flicked my TV on. There, the monstrous man stood looking over the people.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the 75th year of the Hunger Games," he smiled.

'Really? You think?' the little voice in my head laughed.

"It was written in the charter of the games, that every 25 years, there will be a Quarter Quell to keep fresh for each new generation, in memory of those who died in the uprising against the Capitol," he continued, "the Quarter Quell is distinguished from other games by having a special significance."

'Yeahhhh special!' the voice smirked again.

"And this year, the 75th anniversary of defeating the rebellion, we celebrate the third, as a reminder that even the strongest can't overcome the power of the Capitol," he said.

'We'll see.'

"On this, the third quarter quell the male and female tributes will be reaped from the existing pool of victors in each district," snow said. His voice filling my hollow home.

"They will present themselves on reaping day, regardless of age..."

I felt tears grown in my eyes and I sprinted out of my house. I'd didn't know where I was going, or how I was getting there. I was the only girl from eight. I was going back. I quickly found a taxi and told the driver to take me to seven. He did as I asked and I left a heavy tip as thanks. Then I sprinted to Johanna's house in the victor's village. The rain was pouring now and my whole body shook with such violence. I was cold and soaked to the skin. I banged my hands on the door, like a helpless animal. Soon enough a pale looking Johanna answered.

"Flaire," she murmured ushering me in, "lemme get a towel."

I tried to speak but I couldn't. I just stood there dripping wet all over her floor. She came back with a fluffy towel that I gratefully wrapped around myself before slowly sinking to the floor. Johanna then grabbed the phone and rapidly failed a number.

"Are you here yet?" She asked, the hollowness evident in her voice.

I zoned out aftee that. I couldn't feel anything. Hear anything or see anything. It was just nothing. I couldn't believe it was all going to happen again.

"Come on," Johanna said softly, helping me up.

She led me to her large kitchen where she put on the kettle.

"We're going back together," she said slowly, but a tear rolled down her cheek explaining how she really felt.

"I'm sorry," I breathed.

"I fucking hate Snow," she sobbed.

I nodded and brought her into a hug and we stood there until the kettle boiled. Johanna quickly poured the boiling water into two mugs with tea bags in them. We didn't want to watch anything for fear Snow would announce something else horrible. After about and hour or two there was a knock at the door. I looked at Johanna anxiety written all over my face. She gave a small smile and got up. I didn't follow but stayed curled up on her sofa.

"Glad you made it," she murmured to the visitor.

"Me too," said the voice. A familiar voice. Too familiar.

"Finnick!" I screamed at the top of my lungs running towards him.

He caught me in his arms as I broke down into tears.

"It's all going to happen again," I sobbed, "I can't do it again."

"Shhhhh," he soothed, "you can, you can."

"This is our punishment, he always wanted us all dead," I murmured.

"It'll all be okay," Johanna said quietly.

I appreciated it but I didn't think it'd be enough this time.

***
"I can't let Mags go," Finnick sighed.

"We don't want you to go either," I said.

"I don't want to go," Johanna whispered.

"No one wants to go," I replied.

"Fuck you Snow," Johanna said.

"Like he cares," I spat, "he has it all."

Finnick opened his mouth to reply but making us all jump, the phone screamed out a several rings.

"I'll get it," Johanna said,leaving the room.

"What do you think that's about?" Finnick asked.

"Probably her stylist of something," I replied.

He nodded.

"Sorry I was so.... hysterical earlier, just the thought of going-" I began.

"We all reacted like that Flaire, when I first heard I screamed like i never have before. My throat is raw and it hurts," he said.

I nodded, "I'm sorry."

"So am I," Finnick said.

Suddenly, before anymore could be said Johanna burst in.

"We need to go to the Capitol, now," she said.

"What?" I asked.

"If you leave now we'll make it by morning," she explained.

"Why?" Finnick asked.

"Abernathy wants a meeting, he says it's important or some shit," she said.

"But why're we going?" Finnick asked, "I don't really feel like doing favours for Haymitch."

"And I don't really feel like putting up with a drunk idiot either," Johanna said.

"He isn't all bad," I said.

"He says he has a way we can get out of the games. Alive. All of us," Johanna said, "now can we leave?"

Finnick and I glanced at eachother and shared a look. Within two minutes we were all out of the door and on our way to the capitol.
***
I really don't want to recite the film or book but I couldn't rewrite Snow's speech so I had to copy it. Sorry about that.
Anyways the Quarter Quell is here, FINALLY.
I promise the story is going to get more exciting from here! ❤️❤️
Rosabella xx