I Want What I Can't Have

Love Is Weird

Day four. The last few days had gone by in a flash if I were really honest. I couldn't remember much other than doctors and Finnick. Katniss came to see me on this particular day. When there was no one around. She came and sat on my bed and held my hand. I held hers in return, we both needed the comfort.

"What did they do to him?" She asked.

"Beetee told you..." I began.

"No, not that, well yes that," she said, "but I want to hear it from you. Your story. What happened in that mansion."

"I never went to the mansion," I murmured, "we were all tortured in different forms apart from Enobaria who they couldn't harm because she was from two. At first Peeta was just plainly abused like Jo and I. The one night we heard him..."

I paused remembering his horrible screams for help.

"We heard him screaming like never before but we couldn't do anything. Then he told us you wanted to kill him. We knew the Capitol did something," I said.

"That's why you warned me," she asked.

"That's why I warned you," I nodded.

"What about you?" She muttered, "what did they do to you?"

"They made me murder people," I said darkly, "it was horrible."

"I'm sorry," she said, a tear rolling down her face, "I tried to get you out sooner. I tried to tell them."

"It's okay Katniss," I smiled, "I know."

***
I stared up at the ceiling as the people bustled around me. I could feel as stuff was pushed into my skin or taken out. I could hear the beeping of the heart-rate monitor loudly. I tried to look for Finnick but the doctors blocked any view I could have. Suddenly I felt a wake of nausea and leaned over to be violently sick on the floor. It was weird because I hadn't eaten much since I was here. I looked at my arm that had come up in a red rash. It itched like hell.

"She's having a reaction to morphine," one said.

"What does that mean?" Finnick asked panicked.

"It just means she can't take any morphine for relief," a doctor explained.

It made sense. District 8 could never afford something like morphine, unless we produced it ourselves. I'd never taken an ounce before. But seriously, the one thing that could help me and I had an allergy to it. Fan-fucking-tastic! Finnick walked beside me and caressed my cheek, his fingertips dancing on my skin.

"They'll help you," he whispered.

I was doubtful. I watched as lots of them began to clear out as a girl who looked around fourteen came in. She had blonde hair and brown eyes. Her face was recognisable but I didn't know where from.

"Hello," she smiled, her voice was so sweet.

"Hi," I replied.

"I'm Prim," she said, "I'm here to help you."

"You're Katniss's sister?" I asked.

She nodded. So this was her? Katniss Everdeen's sister. They didn't look at all alike and yet they did. I could see she had a good heart. Like Peeta's. She was pure and innocent and I envied her for it.

"How are you physically feeling?" Prim asked.

"Fine," I replied bluntly.

"You're in no pain?" She asked.

I shook my head, "I feel fine."

"And mentally, how are you doing?" She asked.

"I don't know," I shrugged.