No Fucking Way

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"Shit, shit, shit," you muttered under your breath as you sprinted through the streets of Mondstadt at lightning speed.

You had a bad habit of being late. A habit you detested, but couldn't seem to break. It was always something. Some days you would run into a large group of Hilichurls, others would be due to your horse not cooperating, and sometimes you just simply lost track of time. But it never failed, you were always late.

Today, you had simply slept through your alarm clock, leaving nobody to blame but yourself.

You ran up the stairs and busted into the Knights of Favonius headquarters, still somewhat running through the entryway, then to the basement meeting room where the meeting was being held.

As you snuck in the door, you realized Acting Grand Master Jean had already begun addressing the crowd consisting of your co-workers. You winced, realizing you were much later than you had thought you were. Reluctantly, you crept as inconspicuously as possible up to your captain, Kaeya Alberich, sitting at a table and listening to the Acting Grand Master speak.

"Hey, I'm here," you whispered when you were close enough for him to hear. He glared at you and sighed in annoyance. You glared back and rolled your eyes.

"You're late, as usual," he said quietly and marked your attendance on a sheet in front of him.

"You're an asshole, as usual," you muttered under your breath, beginning to turn away.

"What was that?" Kaeya asked accusingly. He didn't even hear you say anything, but he knew you had a snarky comment.

"Nothing!" you replied, faux-cheerfully, "Hi Lisa!" You waved at the librarian, who winked at you as you walked away.

You caught the eye of your friends sitting at a different table and quickly took your spot next to them.

"Hey, Albedo. Hey, Sucrose. What did I miss?" you whispered to your blonde and green-haired friends. Albedo sighed and chuckled a bit.

"Maybe you would know if you weren't late all the time," he muttered. You punched him in the shoulder playfully as he struggled to keep his laughter to a minimum during Jean's speech.

"You haven't missed anything important, don't worry," Sucrose assured you in a quiet voice. You cleared your throat and blushed a little.

"Um, where's Timaeus?" you inquired as casually as possible. Albedo and Sucrose giggled, causing you to blush deeper.

"He's running the alchemist shop while we're gone. Why? Do you miss him?" Albedo pouted at you facetiously, so you hid your face in your hands.

"He was asking about you yesterday," Sucrose sing-songed cheerfully.

"I was just wondering, guys, stop," you moaned in embarrassment, "Can we change the subject, please?"

"Did you check in with your best friend Kaeya?" Albedo snickered. You rolled your eyes.

"I did," you hissed, "and of course he had something ignorant to say. I don't know why he's such a dick to me." You rested your chin in your hand and watched Jean talk up front, not listening to anything she had to say.

"Probably because you're a dick right back to him," Albedo remarked.

"He started it," you muttered grumpily.

"Maybe you should try being nice," Sucrose suggested shyly, "Extend a olive branch, you know?" You scoffed and looked at Sucrose flatly.

"Not gonna happen," you replied. You glanced over at your topic of conversation. His chin was rested in his hand and you saw him whispering something to Lisa with a bored look on his face.

In an instant, you realized you and Kaeya shared the same body language and grimaced in disgust. You quickly sat back in your chair and crossed your arms.

"I can't even stand to look at him," you grumbled, still pretending to listen to Jean's updates, "I wish he would just transfer to a different department so I could assume my rightful position as Cavalry Captain."

"Who said it's rightfully yours?" Albedo chortled.

"I do," you snarled, "I earned it. I should have had it before Diluc, and Kaeya just got it because he's Diluc's brother. He just got it out of nepotism." You looked back to your captain. Lisa whispered something to him, causing him to smirk. His eyes snapped up, as if feeling your stare on him, and you made eye contact for a brief second. You swore his smirk got more sinister before you looked away.

Suddenly, the crowd began applauding, so you followed suit and clapped along, finally paying attention. You gave a worried look to Albedo because you had no idea why you were clapping.

"Because of this generous donation," Master Jean continued, "I am honored to announce that we have some promotions in order." Jean took a nervous deep breath.

"Promoted to Major of the Investigation Team is Sucrose!" You looked excitedly at your friends.

"Me?" Sucrose squeaked as everyone clapped lightly in respect.

"Oh my god, this is amazing! Congratulations!" you whispered, nudging her.

"Promoted to Major of the Logistics Company is Guy!" Jean continued. Everyone clapped again and gave Guy proud smiles. You gave him a thumbs up when he made eye contact with you.

"And promoted to Major of the Cavalry is Y/N," Jean said extremely fast and waited for the applause. But it never came.

You suddenly knew exactly what it felt like to have every single person in a room look at you all at once. Everyone knew you two hated each other. They had all heard about the countless string of drunken bar fights. And they knew there would be another tonight. You stared forward at Jean in disbelief. The silence was unbearable. Your body felt like it was on fire.

And then laughter rang out. It bounced off the walls and echoed in the meeting room. Eyes shifted off of you and onto Kaeya, who was laughing out loud. Your demeanor shifted from surprise to that of anger. He was laughing at you.

"I'm so sorry, Acting Grand Master Jean," he said, still chuckling, "Please, continue." Jean took in a sharp breath before moving on.

"Let's have a round of applause for all our new Majors," Jean announced quickly and started the applause by clapping herself. The applause was less than enthusiastic, but it helped transition out of the awkwardness.

"Sounds like you two are about to spend a lot of time together," Albedo remarked quietly, with a smirk on his face.

"This can't be happening," you uttered, still reeling from the announcement, "not only that, but now I'm his Major. I'm not even a fully fledged captain because that asshole is standing in my way!" You balled your hands into fists and tried to keep the seething to a minimum.

As master Jean wrapped up the meeting and everyone began preparing to leave, Kaeya walked towards you.

"Well," he remarked, "this is going to be interesting. Isn't it Major Y/N?" The emphasis on the lesser-than title made your blood boil.

"No fucking way," you said.

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