The One

Part 23 - Loved

Bright pov

I feel loved. After p mile confess his feeling for me, i feel so relax and become calmer after all the stunt i did.
I still thinking about his confession, i mean it, i seriously need to think hard. It involve my life and people who  are close to me. It a big changes and sacrifice that i need to think. I must be really carefull.
Honestly i dont know the real him yet. But my heart already trust him, so i need my brain to work hard. I have so much to consider before i accept his confession. And that bastard metawin dont prevent me to be close with p mile. Normally he will prevent me to close with someone he thought can do me harm. He always ask his man to get the info. I wish i can do that, but i know no one beside him who have that ability. Based on his action, i know p mile wont hurt me.  Let get fresh air p, i invite p mile to walk on the seaside. Where to , he ask and look at me from head to toes. Not with that cloth he said. I roll my eyes. The short a bit shorter than usual,  but still ok and we are at the beach.
I dont think it weird. I just walk out and leave him alone. Bright he call me.
Not long after that i felt a jacket on my shoulder but i refuse to use it. He sigh and silently  follow me. I smirk and hide my smile. He should know that i am not a fragile girl who need his protection. He dont need to worry, maybe i can protect him too one day. He should not bother with small matter like this. I need to make him understand, we might be a lover but we are equal because both of us are man. He can't treat me like a girl.
There are something that we need to talk and decide. He need to understand that i dont want to be treat as weak person. He and win both assuming me as a weak person. They need to taste my punch to think twice before treat me like a fragile girl. I continue walking and enjoy the view, suddenly p mile hold my hand. I look at him and ask why. can't i hold your hand he ask. why, i ask again. He look suprise with my question. Can't i hold you without any reason , he ask me back. Yes you can but when we are alone. After for a while i said , p we need to talk. Since i am still thinking, maybe you should think hard too p. I'm not a girl that you need to protect that much, i sincerely said. I need to clarify this with you, you can't expect me will act like a cute guy because i'm not. I will be myself.  Is it ok with you, i ask p mile. He listen silently and look into my face. I touch my face and ask what wrong. He just shake his head. Then i continue, maybe we need more time or maybe what we have now only short term excitement, i dont want that, please think hard p, maybe what you need is not me, i finally said. This is new for me, if it only temporary feeling, i beg you to stop and we can be a friend again. I said looking at his eyes and hold his hand.
I dont need someone who will leave me like my father, i growing up looking at my mom strugle. I'm not that strong, i finally open up to him. I dont even talk about this with win but we have mutual understanding. The thing i hate the most is leave behind. I have bèen living with that feeling in my whole life.  Relationship between man and woman already hard,  but this,us, it gonna be harder, i softly said and stare at his eyes.
I am giving you chance to run from this feeling, because when i love, i love with all my heart. Not even once i walk away from any of my relation. Either love or friendship but i always the one who leaved behind. I dont even notice the tears on my cheek. I am happy with p mile confession but at the same time i really scare, because i know i will never able to be back on my feet if the relation Is not sucessful. I might be spoiled brat but i know how to be in relation. Most of people always said my visual is my strongest point, but for me my best point is loyalty, i will never betray my relation.  I give a sincere smile to p mile.  Let go home, i said and turn around. I felt a bit sad because of p mile silent but i am ready for this. I console my heart. Bright, p mile call and grab my hand. He turn me around and pull me closer. He slowly hug me. I'm sorry for you lost. I'm sorry for not being there for you. I cant fight the destiny but i promise, i will never leave you behind he said. Please trust me , he said holding my face. I keep looking at him finding the sincerity. I cant hold my tears anymore. I'm scare p, i said. Please baby ,he said. Dont cry love, he wipe my tears, then he hug me tightly. Do you trust me baby, he ask again. I look at his eyes and nodded. Then he peck my lip. Be prepared baby, i'm gonna love you all my life , he said teasing. I smile and hug him again.
After a beautiful silent he ask again. Are  you done thinking baby ,he ask me. I just look down getting shy of his enderment. oh still thinking, it ok. You can think as long as you want but i definitely your boyfriend and you are my stilll thinking boyfriend he said. P mile ,i glare at him. I feel really happy and touched by his action. Thank you p.