Always been you - Damiano David

87 - all over again

It was around 8 when we arrived at the studio. It was a mansion that they had bought around a year ago. The main floor was an open living room area with a big kitchen. Upstairs was the actual studio and a few bedrooms.

We were all really hungry so we opened a bottle of wine, put on some music and got to cooking immediately. After a long debate between Vic and Ethan they finally decided on making pasta carbonara.
They sat me down by the kitchen table with a glass of wine in my hand and told me that I didn't have to lift a finger.

I watched them as they cooked, sang, fought and laughed. The sparkle in their eyes and the sound of their loud laughters put a smile on my lips. I was so appreciative of them and everything they did for me. I was far from okay but they made everything feel alright.
"Okay, I can't stand not doing anything, please let me help" I said and stood up from my place.
"You've never listened to what anyone's told you to do, huh?" Ethan teased me.
"Why would I?" I laughed and took a sip of my wine.
"We're fine Liv, sit back down" Thomas told me.
"Oh come on, just tell me what to do" I begged.
"You could set the table" Ethan proposed.
"I'd love to" I said and faked a huge smile at him. He just chuckled.
I took five plates out of the cabinet and placed them on the table. After that I reached for the glasses on a shelf above the stove. As I started taking the glasses out I felt two strong hands on each side of my waist. I immediately knew who's touch it was. I felt like my heart skipped a beat as Damiano slightly moved me to the side, since I was standing in front of the pan on the stove.
"Hey Liv, taste" He said and reached up a spoon of the pasta sauce. I looked up at him and opened my mouth to let him feed me.
He softly smiled and looked at me with curious eyes as I tasted. I got so nervous when he looked into my eyes.
"Good?" He asked me.
"Mhm" I nodded before walking away with the glasses.
"What do you think? Need more salt?" He asked as I walked towards the table.
"No it's fine" I said without turning around. In a way talking to him was uncomfortable since I got so nervous, but at the same time I never wanted to stop talking to him.
"Could use some more pepper though" I told him.

"Okay, try now" He said a few minutes later and reached me another spoon. Once again I opened my mouth and let him feed me. As he placed the spoon in my mouth some of my hair accidentally got in my face. He started laughing a little and slowly stroked it out of my face with both of his hands. I looked up at him as he did so. His soft brown eyes were already looking in mine. God, he looked so flawless.
For a split second I got the impulse to kiss him. I wanted to feel his soft lips against mine and the wonders he did with his tongue, but I quickly came to my senses.
"Better?" He asked me.
"Oh yeah, all better" I said and smoothed my hair down with my hands.
"I meant the food" He chuckled. I immediately felt stupid for thinking he'd care about my hair.
"Oh, the foods better" I said a little surprised.
"It's perfect Damiano" I added. 
"Let's eat then" He said and carried the pan to the dinner table.
"Let's eat" I agreed and sat down by the table.

"When was the last time you talked to Nica?" I asked Vic nervously. Her sister Nica was staying at our apartment to take care of Kitty for the night.
"Like an hour ago, Kitty is fine" She assured me.
"Are you sure? What if something happened to her?" I said worried.
"Nica would call if something had happened" Vic sighed.
"Yeah you're right" I said. "So we'll go and get her tomorrow?" I asked her.
"I'll take care of it, you should just stay here" She told me.
"But she needs all her stuff" I whined.
"I'll get all her stuff, I don't think you should be going into the city right now" She told me. By now everyone around the table were getting tired of me, which I felt bad for. But I couldn't help feeling worried for my little kitten.
"Olivia, Kitty will survive without one of her Tiffany collars" Thomas said.
"Yeah" I sighed and picked at my food with my fork.
"Liv honey, don't you wanna eat?" Ethan asked me carefully and stroked my arm.
"Oh, uhm yeah.. right" I said and carefully got some pasta on my fork. I acted like I had just forgotten to eat, but that wasn't really the case.
I spun the fork around to get the spaghetti on it and then held it up in front of me.
I had barely eaten for the last few days, the dry sandwiches and jello that the hospital tried getting me to eat hadn't really worked.
I had this delicious meal in front of me, but it had so many carbs. I looked at my wrist and my hand holding the fork. It was as thin as it had been when I was 16 years old. Nothing but bones.
I closed my eyes as I took the bite. It was really good, I had to admit.
As I opened my eyes again I saw Damiano slightly glancing at me.
"Good?" He asked me quietly as the others were speaking.
"Yeah" I said and nodded slightly.
I took another bite.

It got easier after a few bites, and the others made a great distraction. After we finished dinner we moved to the table out by the pool. Even though it was dark outside it was still warm.
We sat around the glass table with each a cigarette in hand.
We stayed out there for hours just talking and reminiscing.

...
The next morning I woke up alone in the bed that me and Vic had shared. I got up and got dressed before walking down to the kitchen. There Ethan and Vic were making breakfast. Before I had the chance to say good morning to them I heard little footsteps on the floor. Kitty came skipping towards me.
"Hiii princess" I said excited and picked her up. She meowed and started playing with my hair.
"Good morning Liv" Ethan said to me.
"Morning" I answered without taking my eyes off Kitty. I stroked her soft fur and gave her a bunch of kisses all over her adorable face.
"I didn't know you were getting her so early" I said to Vic.
"Oh Nica had an early class, and I was awake anyway" She explained to me.
"Okay, thank you" I said.
"Of course" She smiled at me. "Do you want a bagel?"
"Yes please" I said. I was surprisingly hungry considering I had just woken up, and was usually mostly ill at this time of day.
She handed me a perfectly toasted bagel on a plate and the cream cheese. I took the knife and started spreading my bagel with my right hand while still holding Kitty with my left arm.
"That would go a lot faster if you put Kitty down" I heard Damiano saying as he entered the kitchen. He was wearing a white t-shirt and dark blue pajama pants. His messy hair and raspy morning voice could just about kill me.
"I have all the time in the world" I said and cuddled Kitty even closer.
He came closer to me and petted Kitty. He was standing so close that I could feel his breath against my skin. As if he wasn't close enough he leaned down and gave her a kiss on her head. Dangerously close to my hand.
Kitty meowed loudly and pretty much pushed him away with her little paw. He started laughing and so did Vic.
"She really does hate me" He chuckled.
"Wonder why" I teased him. He laughed again as he poured himself a cup of coffee.
"Can you pour me some?" I asked him.
"I was just about to" He answered and started pouring a cup for me.
"Really?" I asked surprised.
"Yeah" He said softly and glanced at me before looking back at the coffee he was pouring.
"Thank you" I said and smiled at him.
"I want a cup too" Thomas yelled.
"Yeah me too" Vic agreed.
"Great, cups are in the cabinet" Damiano said and sat down by the kitchen table.
Vic's eyes met mine and she gave me a weird look with widened eyes. I just shook my shoulders and balanced my cup on my plate and carried to the table. I sat down with Kitty in my lap.

"What are we doing today?" I asked as I started eating.
"You are resting today" Ethan told me strictly.
"Ugh, kill me now" I sighed. The last thing I wanted to do was lay in bed all day.
"I wanna tan" Vic said excited.
"Me too, I swear that hospital bleached my tan away or something" I whined.
"You should sue" Thomas rolled his eyes.
"Totally" Vic chuckled.

We spent the entire day out by the pool, enjoying the last bit of Italian summer. I didn't know what it was, but everywhere I went I bumped into Damiano and every time I looked at him he was already looking at me. I felt like I did when he first asked me if the seat next to me in the classroom was free, freshman year. It was like I was crushing on him all over again. I knew it was so wrong, I already had a boyfriend. A gorgeous, smart neurosurgeon who I liked very much. But he wasn't even speaking to me.

Someone who was dying to speak to me though, was Bianca. She wasn't only calling, but also texting and emailing me like crazy. As I laid down on the bed after a long day in the sun I decided to finally call her.
"Olivia! You're driving me crazy" She answered after only one beep.
"Hi Bianca" I sighed.
"Did something happen? Why aren't you answering me?" She asked me stressed.
"I've been in the hospital" I told her. I often felt bad for being so dramatic and inconsistent, she often had to clean up my messes.
"What?!" She said shocked. "What happened?"
"I had an overdose" I told her.
"Oh my god, are you alright?" She asked me.
"Yeah, I'm fine, I'm with Måneskin at their studio for a few days" I explained.
"Okay, that sounds good" She said.
"Yeahh" I nodded.
"Olivia, next time something happens, call me will you?" She asked of me.
"I will Bianca, I'm sorry" I said.

...
😚😚