Joel: What are your goals?
Sausage: To pet all the dogs
Joel: No I mean fitness goals
Sausage: To be able to run fast enough to pet all the dogsGrian: My life isn't as glamorous as my wanted poster makes it look like
Joey: I need a human skull and you can't ask any questions why
Cleo: Only if you don't ask why
Cleo: *pulls out 7 pristine human skulls* take your pick
Joey:
Cleo:
Joey: This one is fineJevin: *gets down on one knee*
Cleo: Oh my god it's finally happening
Jevin: *falls over*
Cleo: The poison is kicking inXisuma: Remember when you didn't try to solve all your problems with attempted murder?
Cleo: Stop romanticising the pastBdubs: Etho I'm sad
Etho: *holds out arms for a hug* it's going to be okay
Grian: Scar I'm sad
Scar, nodding: MoodCleo: *stubs her toe* FUCK
Xisuma: Language!
Cleo: What else am I supposed to say? 'Woe is I?'
Xisuma:
Cleo: You have to accept that swear words are necessary sometimesJoel: I'm 10 times funnier and sexier than you
Jimmy: 10 times 0 is still 0 tho
Joel: Jokes on you I can't do mathCleo: You're right
Xisuma: That's... an unusual phrase for you. Did you just learn it?Etho: When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying 'I haven't decided yet' is typically a good response
Ren: In your opinion, what's the height of stupidity?
Etho: *turning to Bdubs* how tall are you?Impulse: Let me show you a picture from last night that really upset me
Pearl: okay, but in my defence Grian bet me 50c I couldn't drink all that shampoo
Impulse: That's not what I wanted to- you drank SHAMPOO?!Xisuma: You're smiling. Did something good happen?
Cleo: Nooooo, can't I just smile because I feel like it?
Pearl: Jevin ran face first into a wallRen: What's your biggest weakness?
Grian: I can be uncooperative
Ren: Okay, can you give me an example?
Grian: NoScar after putting on a full bodysuit: My flavour is all sealed in
Etho: You can say 'have a nice day' and not have a problem yet if you say 'have a nice 24hrs' it sounds vaguely threatening
Ren: What-
Bdubs: He's having one of those daysSausage: Is something burning?
Joel: Just my love for you
Sausage:
Sausage: Joel, the toaster is on fireCleo: God give me patience
Jevin: I think you mean 'god give me strength'
Cleo: If god gave me strength, you'd be deadRen: Here's a fun Christmas idea. We hang a mistletoe, but instead of kissing you FIGHT whoever is under it
Bdubs: Ren no
Etho: Mistlefoe
Bdubs: Please stop encouraging himScar: Oh, just so you know, it's very muggy outside
Grian:
Grian: Scar I swear if I step outside and all our mugs are in the lawn...
Scar: *sips coffee from bowl*Store worker: Would Mr. Impulse please come to the front desk?
Impulse, arriving at the front desk: Hey, is there a problem?
*Store worker points to Gem and Pearl*
Store worker: I believe they belong to you?
Gem and Pearl simultaneously: We got lost :(
Impulse: I didn't even bring you guys here with me-Bdubs: Must be hard not being able to laugh
Etho: I do have a sense of humour you know
Bdubs: I've never heard you laugh before
Etho: I've never heard you say anything funny
YOU ARE READING
Collision (HermitcraftxEmpires Au)
FanfictionPrequel to Elusion. The Hermits failed to open the vault, and King Ren continues to rule the server. Grian receives mysterious compasses from Grumbot, and the hermit's enter the rift to the world of Empires. Some Hermit's stay behind, and while the...