Thought it was Khayr✅

Chapter 42: We will heal

A/n: i cried my eyes out writing this chapter innalillahi 😭😭

Song of chapter: Say Yes to Heaven by Lana del Rey

Sabira's POV

I think it was around four am. Adeel had woken up after releasing a frightening scream. It was unusual. He usually begins whimpering before crying on medium rare. But today, he released such a loud cry at once. It was like one of the cries he always does when he was being bathed during his first weeks on earth.

I was so startled and flabbergasted that I was almost lost of what to do. I tried breastfeeding him, I gave him his sucker, I rocked him, I hummed, I supplicated. But he continued crying despite all of that. I was forced to come out and walk around the corridor with him. Only then would he keep quiet for a few minutes before starting to whimper again. I was worried that a jinn probably scared him or something. I was told babies do see unusual things before the membrane which prevents humans from seeing jinns fully develop in their eyes. I hypothesized that a jinn had scared him, so i blew at him various protective duas. The last thing i wanted was for my baby to have anything to do with jinns.

I didn't see Mama Suwaiba in the corridor. She's supposed to be around, because it's around that time she wakes up and begin warming up the suhur meal with Laure, before coming back upstairs to wake everyone up.

Sometimes I felt jealous about that. She always gobbles up all of the good deeds. I heard there was a special reward for whoever wakes people up for subh prayer. I also want to be the one who wakes Abas up, but somehow, he always always wakes up before I do.

"Ishuru kaji(cry no more)" I rocked him softly, coaxing him. My eyes were weary. I wanted to sleep so badly. I already wasted so much time while Adeel was sleeping, talking with Mom yesterday and I've been at this for over thirty minutes now. I wanted to sit. I was tired of standing.

"Ko muje wajen matarka(should we go wake up your wife)?" I suggested him, referring to his grandma; my Mom. I wondered if he'd calm down if he entered her arms. He surprisingly stopped crying. I walked to my mom's chamber and turned the door knob.

It was open. "Toh Kai Adeeli, when you get into a similar outburst like this in The States where there's no Mom what are we going to do?" I told my child as I quietly closed the door behind me. I wanted to trick him and just remain in the parlor so as to not wake Mom, but I figured that it's just a few minutes to suhur. It was time to wake up.

"Muje mu tada matar bature ko(let's wake the American boy's wife right?)" I continued speaking to Adeel as I made my way into Mom's room.

I held on to Adeel tightly as my body welcomed a weird, ominous feeling. I looked on her bed. It certainly looked like it had been slept upon, but she wasn't there.

She's probably in the toilet, I thought.

Yet, I couldn't help the massive anxiety that visited me. It was similar to that feeling of suspense you get when you're watching a very scary horror movie. I scanned my eyes around the room and spotted her laid on the prayer mat. She must've slept off while praying. She probably prayed Tahajjud.

It's so awful that I still can't do these activities because I'm not yet clean. I'm just so left out this Ramadan that it's pitiful. In our house, only the men attended Tahajjud. The women did it separately and individually, for those who wanted, not the likes of Sakina probably. She's probably there with one leg at the east and one at the west. I doubt if Hafeez would think to do it too.

Since Adeel has become silent, I carefully placed him on Mama's bed and walked towards her. I bent down and tapped on her shoulder.

"Mama, wake up. Lokacin suhur yayi(it's time for suhur)"