Nakatulala lamang si Apple Pie habang pinagmamasdan ang hardin kung nasaan siya ngayon. She decided that the house was quite suffocating for her so she chose to stay outside and get some air. Alam naman niyang kakailanganin na rin niyang pumasok maya-maya sapagkat papagabi na. Hinatiran na siya ni Pedro ng pagkain dito ngunit light meal lamang iyon dahil bawal daw biglain ang tiyan niya.
Hearing what they said earlier made her heart scatter, but after a few minutes with herself, she was quickly able to collect her mind. Ewan ba at ang weird ata niya ngunit wala siyang maramdaman ngayon.
No fear, no sadness, nothing.
Maybe the emotions were too much for her that she suddenly became numb. Hindi na niya alam. Ikaw ba naman ang bigyan ng taning, ewan na lang niya kung hindi ka mawalan sa huwisyo.
"Langga . . ." Naputol ang malalim niyang pag-iisip nang marinig ang malumanay na tinig ni Yohan. Nilingon niya ito at nakita ang lalake na nakatayo sa may di kalayuan. She wasn't even able to notice him walking towards her. She weakly smiled at him and that must be his cue to finally approach her. Tinitigan niya ng mabuti ang mukha nito at naawa dahil kitang-kita ang stress roon. He has under-eye bags, his hair was like a bird's nest, and his lips were cracked. Mukhang wala pang tulog dahil sa pag-aalala sa kaniya. It must have been hell for him while she was sleeping.
Agad niyang hinawakan ang pisngi ni Yohan nang maupo ito sa tabi niya. Hinaplos-haplos niya iyon habang malungkot na nakangiti dito. "Pinabayaan mo ang sarili mo." Hinagod niya ang stubbles nito pati na rin ang mga mata nitong para bang isang pitik lamang ay sasarado na.
"How can I think of myself when you spent days lying down on that bed, without any assurance that you would wake up."
"Yohan . . ." nahihirapan niyang tawag dito. "I think you should practice how to live without me," she jokingly said but his stoic face remained unchanged.
"Please stop."
"What?" Hindi ito sumagot at tahimik lamang siyang tinitigan. She was about to open her mouth to ask him again but she then noticed the tears coming from his eyes. Nag-unahan ang mga ito na bumagsak na para bang ang tagal na nitong kinikimkim ang mga iyon at ngayon lamang nagkaroon ng tiyansa na makawala. "Why are you crying?" tawa niyang tanong dito ngunit agad ring nawala ang ngiti sa mga labi niya dahil sa sagot nito.
"Because you won't."
"Yohan . . ." tawag niyang muli dito.
"Please cry . . . or get angry, throw a tantrum. I don't care, just please . . . please stop smiling. Please stop pretending that you are okay," iyak nitong ani bago siya biglaang hinagkan. His cries became louder while his face was buried in her neck. Para itong bata na nangangailangan ng kalinga ng ina. "I'm sorry, it's my fault. It's all my fault. If it weren't for me then you wouldn't even be tangled in this time travel shit. Kung hindi mo lang siguro ako nakilala ay hindi ka rin mapupunta sa sitwasyong ito. Lagi na lang ako ang dahilan kung bakit nasasaktan ka."
"Ano bang pinagsasasabi mo, Yohan?" pagpapatigil niya dito sabay hila sa katawan ng lalake papalayo sa kaniya upang makita niya ng maayos ang mukha nitong luhaan.
"It just feels like all I brought to your life were misery and hardships. Lagi ka na lang nasasaktan dahil sa akin."
"Hindi iyan totoo, Yohan." Her eyes were starting to water as she held both of his cheeks in her palms. "You're the best thing that ever happened to my life. Ikaw ang nagpakita sa akin ng mga bagay na ni minsan ay hindi ko susumaing makikita o mararanasan. Ikaw ang nagbigay ng liwanag sa buhay ko kaya naman huwag na huwag mong sasabihin na malas ka o na ikaw ang nagdala ng problemang ito sa akin. I made my decision to stay here in the past even though Xav already warned me multiple times. Kahit hindi niyo pa nasasabi sa akin ang lahat-lahat ay alam ko ng iyon ang dahilan ng kamatayan ko. I already had a hunch but I diregarded it because of how hard-headed I am. Sarili kong desisyon ang nagdala sa akin sa kapahamakan, hindi ikaw."
"I'm going to save you, I promise that," maluha-luhang pangako ni Yohan. "I'll do whatever it takes, okay?" He looked like a fool convincing himself with something that was totally impossible.
Para ata siyang tanga tignan habang nakangiti na basang-basa ang mukha dahil sa kaniyang mga luha. "Yohan, I'm scared," amin niya dito at mukhang iyon lamang ang senyales na hinihintay ng kaniyang sistema upang totally na mag-breakdown. She started crying, knowing that she only have days to be with Yohan.
Ang unfair ng mundo.
God knows how much hardships they had to go through just to be together. Ang rami na nilang napagdaanan ni Yohan. Akala niya ito na ang happily ever after nila. Ano pa ba ang pagkukulang niya sa panginoon?
Mabilis naman siyang niyakap ng lalake at inalo. "Shh . . . I know, I know. Hindi kita pababayaan, pangako ko iyan sa iyo."
Napangiti siya dahil sa sinabi nito. "Why don't we enjoy my remaining days? Alam mo na, do the things that we always wanted to do."
"It's not your -" He was about to protest about what she said but she cut him directly.
"Shh . . . mas mainam na mapaghandaan natin kaysa naman tayo pa ang manghinayang sa huli." Hinawakan niya ang kamay nito at hinalikan iyon. "Para sa akin, gusto kong mag-all out kainan lang tayo tapos mag-shopping, gumala, umikot-ikot. How about you? Anong gusto mong gawin?" Alam niyang ang weird pakinggan ng sinasabi niya. Ang gaan ng tono niya na para bang hindi kamatayan niya ang pinag-uusapan nila, pero ano pa ba ang magagawa niya ngayon? Instead of wallowing and drowning herself with self pity, she would rather spend her remaining days happy with Yohan.
"I want to marry you," walang-alinlangang sagot ni Yohan sa kaniyang tanong na nagpabigla sa kaniya.
"Huh?"
"I said . . ." Yohan suddenly cupped her left cheek and said, "Gusto kitang pakasalan." Without missing a beat, Yohan get down on his knees and pulled a simple yet beautiful ring from his pocket. "Binibini, alam kong hindi ako nararapat sa iyo ngunit maaari mo bang tanggapin ang isang katulad ko bilang iyong kabiyak?"
Napatakip siya sa kaniyang bibig bago nakangiti itong sinagot. With teary eyes and trembling hands, she accepted his ring while answering, "Isang karangalan na maging iyong asawa, ginoo."
BINABASA MO ANG
My Everything In His Past (2nd Book of 'In His Past' Series)
Ficción histórica"I wish I realized much sooner how important you are, my wife, my president, my everything."
