Shattered

Chapter 58: Unexpected Guests

Violet's POV:

"Do you think the universe fights for souls to be together? Some things are too strange and strong to be coincidences."- Emery Allen

Marnie coming to my door sobbing not even an hour after Kaden left was the cherry on top of a fucking horrible night. I hadn't even cleaned up the blood stain on the carpet and I didn't have time to when she was sobbing at my door, so I threw a blanket over it and let her in, wishing I had a colder heart and could just tell her I was in the middle of my own breakdown and couldn't handle hers.

I couldn't. She stayed a long time and I felt like a bitch because I was barely listening to her vent about needing to get ahold of her addictions. I could only think about Kaden and the bond and seeing him hurt and what the hell my feelings were and how I was supposed to sort them out.

After Marnie finally left, I paced around my apartment, then went through the pictures Kaden and I took together on that road trip along the coast of California. My heart hurt so much at the idea of not seeing him again, but it hurt at the idea of us being forced into something.

The werewolf thing was cool, I just wished it didn't come with the mate thing. I wanted to know we were into each other because we really were, not because of an outside force. Then that moment he told me he loved me...

I wished he wouldn't have said that. It was the fastest way to get me to shut down. It wasn't a conscious decision to completely block off anyone using that word around me, it just happened and I didn't know how to stop it. Love was a hard no for me and I knew I just had to get him out of there or the word hanging there with no reciprocation would make everything worse.

Love. The word stabbed at my heart like sharp thorns.

I plopped down on my bed after having picked up my phone to call him about eight times. My emotions were all over the place and I couldn't tell if I was missing him so badly because I was actually missing him or because that bond was making me. I wished there was someone I could talk to. Sometimes when I was stuck on a problem, all I needed was to explain the problem to someone else and it would start making sense.

Alek was the only one I could even consider and he didn't have service. Even then, was it fair for me to talk to Alek about this when I knew Kaden and his friends were trying to keep a low profile? I trusted Alek more than anyone in the world, but he was my best friend. Not theirs. They didn't know they could trust him and it felt wrong to bring him into it without asking.

Mrs. F, by some bizarre twist of fate, might've been an option but it was the middle of the night and she would be at the senior center all day the next day.

I could've called Kaden but that wouldn't help. I needed someone not as invested as we were. Sighing, I sat up and stared at my computer, thinking about all the ways this made everything make sense. All that weird shit online I found about him, the way Xander was able to hear Alek mentioning a brother that night in the bar...

Wait. Addie. Addie was human. If Addie was human, and she was with Xander, that probably meant she was his mate. It felt weird to ask to talk to a woman I'd only met a handful of times but it was my only safe option. She would undoubtedly want me to be with Kaden, it was clear she loved him. Even so, she had to understand a little, didn't she? Or maybe she wouldn't. Maybe she'd think I was crazy for being hesitant.

Fuck, it was the only idea I had and I felt like I was losing my mind. I brought up Kaden's number and my thumb hovered over the call button. Would he be upset at the idea of me calling only to ask for Addie's number? Or maybe it would make him feel better that I was trying, that I wanted to understand. He was so heartbroken when he left and it broke me too but fuck, I couldn't be with someone when I was uncertain how real it was. Regardless of her bias towards Kaden, Addie was the only person I could ask about this.