Shattered

Chapter 18: Exquisite

Violet's POV:

"I know you think your fire is burning out, but I still see you shining through. You got it in you." - The Banners

I hadn't slept in days. Lola's words cut so deep, I couldn't think about anything else. Well, that and the voicemail Kaden left for me. I'd replayed it an embarrassing amount of times because it was strangely comforting. He sounded so genuinely worried, but of course cracked a joke in the middle of it. Having him seeming to really care that I was okay eased at least a small part of the sting Lola left, but I couldn't respond to him. Lola's words sent me into a spiraling depression that I knew would get out of hand if I didn't do something, which was why I got out of town before it could get worse than the uncontrollable sobbing that was already happening.

For days, I wrote and rewrote texts to Kaden, finding them all stupid and pointless, including the one I finally sent. But then he responded like everything was fine between us and for some reason, that was enough of a release of tension that I was finally able to sleep after spending almost eighty hours awake.

When I ended up in a dream I didn't recognize, I felt panicked. My nightmares were horrible but at least they were relatively consistent. This was different. It didn't feel unsafe at all and that only put me more on edge. I was in a forest that barely seemed real, where the trees almost seemed sentient and the light filtering through the leaves illuminated small particles of dust that seemed much more alive than anything I'd ever seen before.

It might've been beautiful if I wasn't on alert.

A crunch behind me had me turning, grasping for weapons to defend myself but they weren't there. Panic started taking over because I knew it couldn't end well. It never ended well. I wasn't sure what to expect but the wolf that came through the trees really surprised me.

At first, I was nervous, but the longer I looked at it... It barely seemed real. The colors were different, a much lighter tone, almost blonde that I hadn't seen before. I'd seen varying shades of wolves but this one... It was almost colored more like a coyote than a wolf, but it was definitely a wolf. A big one. All those things were strange but was even stranger was the eyes. Beautiful, blue eyes stared at me but not in a challenge, more like... Curiosity?

I stepped back and the wolf lowered its head, flattening its ears and making my brows furrow because it was almost like it was trying to look innocent. I took another step back and the wolf let out a light whine then sank to the ground and rolled onto its back, exposing its belly and opening its mouth in what looked like a freaking smile. A wolf smiling. And from what I knew of research... It was trying to seem nonthreatening. That was a show of submission and it made me even more suspicious.

"Okay, I'm just gonna..." I said, taking another step back. The wolf whined lightly again and rolled onto its stomach, staring at me with big eyes that had my heart melting. Why was this dream wolf so fucking adorable? I knew what would happen if I gave in. It would attack, or it would change to someone else, something awful would definitely happen.

Except, I'd learned a long time ago nightmares were inevitable. I couldn't make them go away and the faster I got it over with, the better. So I moved forward instead, walked right up to it and sat down, waiting for it to attack.

It didn't.

Its tongue lolled out the side of its mouth and it slowly crawled closer to me, giving me another wolfish smile before resting its head in my lap. I waited for a bite, for something to happen, but nothing did. It just laid there and looked up at me with those unnaturally blue eyes.

"Okay, I guess we're friends," I said, narrowing my eyes at it. I didn't have good dreams. This had to just be a delayed nightmare, probably existing for the purpose of making me think I could have a good dream so when it turned bad, it would feel worse.