i refuse to sink.

chapter six.

"Zayn?" I whispered. I woke up because I was getting moved around. I opened my eyes and noticed Zayn carrying me up the stairs.

"Yes babe?" Zayn asked brushing a piece of hair out of my face.

"I'm scared." I whispered. I blinked away the tears.

"What's wrong?" Zayn asked as he put me down on the bed. It was so warm and comfortable.

"What if he finds me Zayn?" I croaked out, I couldn't fight back the tears so I let them fall.

"He won't, I promise. I talked to Simon and he is working something out, okay? You are safe with us." Zayn clame me.

"Mhhmm." I nodded and closed my eyes. I felt Zayn get up from the bed. "Zayn."

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

"For what?" Zayn walked back over to me.

"For kissing Harry." I choked out.

"He kissed you babe, its okay." Zayn half smiled.

"I kissed back Zayn." Why the hell was I telling him this? When I am drunk I usually tell people my secrets, great.

"I know, I see the way you look at each other besides the glaring. I know babe, I do." Zayn said and kissed my cheek before leaving. What does he mean? Do I like Harry? Oh my gosh. I like Harry.

******

"Morgan, babe wake up." Eleanor cooed over me. I groaned and flipped over on the bed and covered my self with blankets.

"Go away." I groaned.

"You know, we never had our movie night." Eleanor joked.

"Shit, I'm sorry El." I sat up and apologized.

"No worries, I came home late anyways, I just knew it would get you up." Eleanor laughed.

"Ugh shut up. My head hurts." I said before getting out of bed. I sat up to fast and felt really dizzy, then my stomach started turning. I ran to the bathroom and threw up.

"I will go get you some medicine babe." Eleanor said. I bent over and threw up again. I felt someone reach behind me and pull my hair back as I released the contents from my stomach once again.

"I feel like shit." I groaned. I thought it was Eleanor behind me, it wasn't.

"Don't drink so much then." Harry joked. I turned around quickly making sure I heard right. Harry was standing behind me holding my hair. I felt sick again. "You okay Morgan?" Harry asked. He actually sounded concerned.

"Do I look okay?" I snapped.

"Sorry for trying to be nice." Harry snapped back and walked off angrily. I felt bad, I really did. But how does he expect me to be nice to him after he forced himself on me?

After I showered and slipped on a pair of Zayns sweat pants and his sweatshirt I walked downstairs. Niall was passed out on the couch. Liam was on the phone, Harry, Louis and Eleanor were talking and Zayn was no where to be seen.

"Hi guys." I said. They all looked up, apart from Niall.

"Hey, how you feeling?" Louis asked.

"Better, has anyone seen Zayn?" I asked.

Harry rolled his eyes and pointed to the back porch. I walked over and saw Zayn leaning over the balcony smoking.

"Hey Zayn, mind if I join you?" I asked shyly as I stepped outside

"Be my guest." Zayn smiled and handed me a cigarette.

"Thanks." I say.

"Simon called this morning." Zayn said looking straight ahead.

"What did he say?" I asked.

"He said he will help, and he got you a lawyer. A good one that is." Zayn smiled and looked me in the eyes. Zayn was gorgeous, don't get me wrong, but I saw him as my best friend, not a crush.

"Thanks Zayn, I would never be able to try to fight him if it wasn't for you."

"No problem babe, I understand you were just scared. Your court day is in 4 days. Louis and Eleanor will drive us over, okay? We will be there every step of the way." Zayn put out his cigarette and gave me a big hug. I shed a few tears, happy tears though.

"I love you guys." I whispered.

"I know you do." Zayn winked at me. "Lets go inside." Zayn said and led me indoors. Eleanor looked at me then Zayn, and Zayn nodded. Eleanor whispered something in Louis's ear and they both got up and gave me a huge hug.

"Everything is going to be okay." Louis said while hugging me.

"Wait, what is going on?" Harry interrupted. I pulled away and bit my lip, I do that when I am nervous. I looked at Zayn who gave me a questioning look. I nodded.

"Erm well, you know how we said Morgan fell at the party a few nights ago?" Zayn asked. Liam and Harry nodded and look interested. Harry glanced over at me and I quickly looked away. Eleanor squeezed me tighter. "She didn't fall she was attacked." Zayn mumbled. Harrys eyes shot up to mine.

"By who?" Harry asked angrily.

"The man guy who raped her 3 months ago, Tyler." Zayn whispered. I closed my eyes and buried my head into Eleanor's chest.

"SHE WAS RAPED!?" Harry screamed.

"Yeah." Zayn replied.

"Are we just going to sit here and watch her cry? Is the man locked up?" Harry yelled at Zayn.

"She has a court case in a few days, she never told anyone until the night of the party." Eleanor chimed in. Harry looked at me sympathetically.

"Why?" Harry whispered.

"I was scared." I mumbled. I looked up at Harry who was walking closer. He opened his arms for a hug.

"I didn't mean what I said, I am so sorry." Harry whispered in my ear, he squeezed me tighter as I cried into his chest.

"Its okay, I forgive you Harry." I whispered back and planted a kiss on his cheek.

"Did you know the guy before you were umm raped?" Liam asked.

"Yeah." I nodded. "A week before he raped me he broke up with me, because I wouldn't have sex with him. I thought I loved him so I wanted to wait so it was special. So he broke up with me. That night Tyler called said he wanted to take me somewhere, and I was still in love so I agreed." I took a deep breath and Harry squeezed my hand. "Well we kept walking farther and farther and farther into the woods. I tried to run but he knocked me out, and I woke up on the ground to him taking my clothes off. He said he would kill me if I told, so I never did." I cried Harry pulled me onto his lap and rubbed my back.

"I am so sorry Morgan, you are so strong you should never had to have gone through that alone." Harry said.

"Yeah well I did which is when I started doing this." I said and rolled up my sleeves and moved my bracelets aside. Scars were all down my arm. No one would ever guess that I used to cut.

"Promise us you will never do it again Morgan." Zayn said.

"I promise." I said and gave them all a hug.

"You are so strong Morgan, don't ever let anyone tell you different." Harry whispered in my ear.

Maybe Harry wasn't so bad after all.

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harry and morgan :}

what do you think?

xoxo.