"Yearning in Silence"

9

Then

Kim

I was not invited into this hang out with my brother, he never really texted me and asked  or me to come. I just somehow went in this carnival to stroll and see if Yohan would like it here, the next time I ask him for a date.

Since I called Chay earlier, and he told me he was fine, but he couldnt hang out with me cause he already had a plan with his brother, and told me that we'll catch up tomorrow. I decided to just went out the house, and I ended up being here.

But then I saw Kinn with P'Porsche walking, holding each other's hand, and so they told me that they were with Chay. So yeah, I looked for him , and saw him buying.

"Chay" I called him, which he might did not hear since he didn't look back at me, so I called him again.

"Chay" I called again, my voice getting louder.

And when he  finally turned around, I was like  'damn if he isn't looking cute right now.

" O-hh, you're here." He stammered

"Well, P'Kinn asked me if I wanted to come... I didn't know you'd be here" I lied, I knew he's here, Kinn told me earlier.

I studied his demeanor for a little bit, and I might say that he isn't just looking cute, he is rather pretty, but when I looked at his hand, he was holding two cans of soda, that made me wonder if he is with his friend, or maybe he is with Yohan. But I can't ask him straight if he is with Yohan, so I asked something instead

" Are you on a date?" I asked wanting to know if he is, or he is with his friends.

He  smiled at him genuinely. But he didn't answer he just looked at me smiling.

I might look calm from the outside I feel my mind everywhere, I couldn't focus on one thing. Chay looked pretty tonight, and what if he is with Yohan... Or what if.. he really have a date?
I don't think I could ever like to picture Chay dating, he is just so innocent for that kind of things, what if he got hurt?

" CHAY! " I heard someone shouted

Chay turned to him, and waved at him.

I turned to look at the person, and the familiar looking guy came towards us, and that's when I realized it was...

"Macau"
"Kim"

We  said in unison...

"You know Macau?" I asked Chay, frowning.

"Yes,. Chay and I are best friends since like forever." Macau said getting closer to Chay, as he ruffled his hair.

Chay's hair is fluffy, it's beautiful.

Get your hands off him. That's what I want to say to Macau

"Oh." Is all I could utter

"Do you wanna come with us? We're riding the Ferris wheel next!" Chay invited me, and I said yes.
***

I do like ferris wheel ride or any other ride, but I think I don't like it now.

Chay, and Macau are extremely close, which is annoying, cause I think I'm just their chaperone. I want Chay to talk to me, smile at me and laugh with me, but he is with Macau, he is doing it with Macau.

I felt so annoyed by every little thing they do, I feel excluded. I don't like feeling excluded.

As time went by, my annoyance just kept on increasing, Macau gave Chay the keychain he won from claw machine, which is what I was suppose to do, but too late he already have Macau's.

I told Chay that I'll give the other to Yohan, which made him smile a little.

After some more time with them, laughing, talking, and being all touchy, I felt myself getting more annoyed so I just told them I'll be going.

It's not like I'm jealous or anything, I don't like Chay romantically, and I just met him a few months ago, but it's just— we're friends. I don't like the idea of anyone taking my friends away from me.

And I feel like Chay is trying to not talk to me too much, it made me wonder what relationship he had with Macau is... Are they really just friends ? Or maybe he like Macau? Or Macau likes him?

Arghhh all of this thinking is making my head ache. I'll just sleep it off , I may be just tired.

And tomorrow is Monday, I'll be able to tell Chay everything about my date with Yohan, and I'll be seeing Yohan's beautiful face tomorrow.