Spelivia, the Next Chapter

Regrets

Spencer POV
Returning to the beach house and heading straight to my room, I didn't even acknowledge my roommates as they gave me a strange look. When I previously left to talk to Liv, I was so confident that we would be reunited. However, she wants nothing to do with me and I am completely responsible. I pick up my phone and dial the one person who I can turn to whenever I don't know what to do next.  One I do know is I will fight for Liv until the day I die. It's funny how I am reminded of a conversation my mom and aunts had in the past about relationships, " trying to rush and move on with another person to get over the one you love, will only hurt yourself in the future.

Crenshaw
As I enter my childhood home, I noticed the look of sadness on my mom's face. She could sense the sadness, hurt, and disappointment as she looked into my eyes.  No matter what occurs in my life, good or bad, my mom was always been my outlet for expressing my feelings.  As I stood in the entrance, my mom motioned for me to come over and sit on the couch, our reserved space for conversations like the one we are about to have.

She looked at me and said one word "Olivia" and I motioned my head acknowledging she was right.  One thing I admire about my mom is that she will make her point of view known, whether it is in my best interest or someone else. I start the conversation talking about Liv and my mom knows where this is headed. The first thing she said was, I assume you finally had that conversation with Olivia and it did not go has you planned. I respond to my mom saying that, that is an understatement. I sincerely thought Liv would automatically get back together, but the look I receive from my mom is different.  Spencer my mom says in a tone that I knew a lecture would follow.  She pretty much pointed out some of the same things that Liv talked about.  However, knowing my mom Mrs. Grace Carter, she had a lot more to say.

Baby, my mom says, you have a lot to learn about women and relationships.  Spencer you were living your life recklessly after "YOU" broke up with Olivia, (till this day I still don't understand), however, I will wait a bit before I start on that topic.  Baby you know I love you and your brother more than anything and because I love you Alonzo, I will tell you the truth.  Why, would you automatically think Olivia would take you back with open arms after what she has been through and what you have done, by the way without having any regards about how it would affect her.  Spencer, my mom says, I know you love Olivia and always have, but your actions said otherwise.  I shake my head agreeing with my mom as I though about all the things Olivia said to me.  My mom begins saying, baby remember the conversation we had when you told me Olivia wanted you back?  I nod as I specifically remember every word she said.  Instead of trying to talk to her, you avoided her and when you finally decided you could not avoid her any longer, Billy died.  You two were best friends before you got into a relationship and still being her friend, you was not there for her during the time she needed her friend the most.  Then after Billy's death Olivia contacted me when she realized you were shutting everyone out because you had not dealt with his death.  Despite believing that you was still with that girl, she talked to me about organizing a get together for all you friends and love ones to let you know that you had all of our support. Spencer, you forgot about her and spend more time with that girl knowing that you only when into and continued forcing that relationship to get over Olivia and try to spare the girl feelings.  Baby, my mom says, Olivia saw all of that, but Spencer, taking her to Olivia's Award Ceremony, what was you thinking.  I saw the deep hurt and pain on Olivia's face when you tow showed up holding hands.  Baby, my mom says did you even think that Olivia was still grieving Billy's death and on top of that she was heart broken?  A tear rolled down my face when I heard these words come from my mom.  Having no regard for Liv's feelings and practically slapping her in the face showing up with Alicia at her ceremony and house. 

As I continue to listen to my mom, the tears could not stop falling knowing what I did to Liv.  I was trying not to hurt Alicia by staying with her and disrespecting the woman I truly love.  I would do anything to take back the pain I caused Olivia, but I can't and now I fully understand why she wants nothing to do with me for now.  What have I done, I say to my mom.