lacuna

Chapter Seventeen

Eli's pov

My smile transformed into a smirk as I watched Justin, knowing full well who he was staring at from the way he had his hood pulled on and his hazel eyes only slightly bigger than usual, though his face remained blank. He didn't seem to notice me watching him. I let out a cough and he blinked, snapping out of the lovey-dovey world he was in.

"Does she look pretty?" I asked, casually, and took a long sip of my Coke.

"She always looks pretty" he replied before he could hold himself back and I grinned wolfishly as his eyes widened, "W-wait, what, no, I didn't-".

"Aww, papa bear's in love" Asher nudged Justin's side, who had his head lowered trying to hide his blush.

"Shut the fuck up" he muttered before pulling the hood further down. I chuckled and zipped my mouth shut when Justin kicked at me under the table.

"Shut it, Eli. I bet Fallon wouldn't want you talking about other girls now, would she?" his voice had a hint of a tease to it and now it was my turn to turn fucking red. I glared at him as I notice him smiling from under his hoodie and my embarrassment only increased as Asher started wiggling his eyebrows at me.

"Fucking assholes" I muttered and gave my coke a furious sip.

"Oh, what? You don't think we see you looking at her in the hallways or the way you always try to talk to her when no one's around?" Asher smirked, "She is pretty cute, though".

I grabbed him by the neck and held him in a headlock, jealousy by my side again, as I rubbed the top of his head hard, but he only laughed, "Whose side are you on, bastard?". But he was right. I would always look at her whenever I see her in the hallways or in class. I would always corner her whenever none of the guys I hang around with were there. And even as this Asher motherfucker continued to laugh in the background, teasing me, my eyes travelled to the empty seat Fallon would sit at during lunch whenever she wasn't anywhere else. It wasn't...normal for me. Ever since my mom left, I'd completely shut myself off from love. It felt more secure. For me and the state of mind, I was in back then. Then, Asher and Justin became my safe place. The only two people I'd ever relied on up to this point in my life. And then Fallon came in. Could one human ever be too pure for this world? Could one fucking human be that beautiful? But no, I wasn't in love with her. That was too much of a strong word.

Besides, did I look like someone who'd fall in love with Fall Campbell?

I didn't know how it fucking happened or when but I wanted her pale, warm skin on mine, her hair tangled in between my fingers, her laugh that she does only for me, her eyes on me and only me. Fuck. I tried so fucking hard to stop. I tried with the chicks in pubs and random parties I go to but it didn't feel like it used to. It felt dull and empty. What the fuck was happening to me? I hated it. This feeling inside me whenever I see her, with her head lowered but that smile, that fucking smile, appearing the moment her eyes land on me. I hated it.

***********

Fallon's pov

It wasn't supposed to be this way. No getting close to people, no building up strong bonds or falling in love; that was the promise.

But as I snuggled into the armchair with The Picture of Dorian Grey open on my lap, I knew the exact opposite was happening. Mrs Rodrigo wanted us to do a small presentation about one of Oscar Wilde's books in groups of two and guess what? My partner was Justin, the 'extremely hot, quiet drummer' as people say. It was like the world wanted me to get attached to people and for them to become closer to me. Because Justin asked if I wanted to work on this presentation at Asher's house this week and get it over with and I agreed, my first thought was whether Eli will be there. I didn't know what type of relationship I had with him but I never thought I'd be this involved in his life. We made eye contact in the hallways. A lot. And each time, whenever his 'friends' were around, he didn't know me, had never talked to me, despised having me tutor him and hadn't just shared very personal information with me a couple of days back. It was like a silent deal. No one could know we were, what would you call it, acquaintances? Yeah, I guess you could say that.