lacuna

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Eli's pov

For the past few days, Fallon spent most of her days with us, at the lake, at Asher's house and sometimes on the school rooftop. With her around, it was always like I was in a damn movie. Whenever she laughs or smiles or so much as looks at me, my heart skips a beat. I fucking hated it. But at the same time, I craved it.

A day without a dose of her felt like a day without a drag of a cigarette but so much sweeter and luring.

She warmed up to Asher and Justin so slowly but softly, as if cautiously stepping onto a frozen lake, hoping it wouldn't crack. I didn't blame her. Not one fucking bit. It was clear from the start she had trust issues and I knew I was a part of the section of people who gave her that. But I watched as she started joking around with Asher and Barney, playing in his lawn, and how she felt comfortable around Justin, who was someone known for his cold, stoic exterior, but became a warm big brother figure in her life. Though she never invited herself to any of our houses or our little endeavours and conversations, I always made sure to. But most of all, I watched how she broke out of the chains she had wrapped around herself, how she started letting herself smile more and enjoy what 'life' was. And I promised myself that I would find a million ways if I have to to keep her that way. Yet, I still failed.

It didn't happen quickly. Not in a blink. No, it made sure to happen slowly, the pieces falling into place to build the story up. And the fucking ridiculous thing about it was that it had to happen on a Friday.

I was waiting in our usual classroom, leaning against the wall, expecting her to walk in any minute. My fingers played with the bracelet she made for me. A smile played at my lips as I stared at it, the strings woven so neatly yet messily together. She appeared in the doorway, her head lowered.

The smile on my face deepened before I could control it, "Hey...". But the moment I noticed how she was oddly avoiding looking up at all, I trailed off, a frown replacing my smile.

"You okay?" I took her hand and it was limp in mine.

She nodded, her hair shadowing her face, "Mhm. Great".

Her voice sounded puffy. The type of voice you get when you have a cold.

"Okay, enough with that, Fallon," I said trying to peek at her, "Look at me".

She didn't obey and I pulled her towards me, not letting go of her hand.

"Come on, sweetheart, look at me" I slid my hand along her jaw and tilted her head up. Something sharp jabbed at me in the side when I saw her. The coffee brown eyes that were always tinged with honey and sunlight were pale as if all of the warmth in them were sucked out of them and dark red curves lined underneath them. Her nose was swollen and flushed pink.

And despite all that she gave me a smile, "I'm fine, really".

"No, the fuck, you aren't. Who made you cry?" I said, my jaw clenching as I wiped my thumb gently along the sensitive skin under her eyes, making her wince.

She shook her head, "It's nothing, Eli-"

"You either say it or someone's going to the hospital today" I cut her off, dipping my head to her level with a smirk. She frowned and it was fucking adorable; the way her nose scrunched up and the way she attempted to look mad at me.

"I had a fight with my parents, that was it," she said and let her head fall against my chest, "And I haven't been sleeping". She sniffed and my arms instinctively took their place on her waist, pulling her in for the hug she wanted but never asked for.

"And you've also been crying" I added.

She sniffed again, mumbling, "Oh, geez, what gave that away?". I let her bury her face in my shirt nevertheless as I breathed her in.