lacuna

Chapter Eighteen

Fallon's pov

I didn't move. I didn't know how to move.

His lips were soft but firm against mine as one of his hands cupped a side of my jaw, tilting me up to him. And when I didn't respond, he began pulling away but then I moved. My hands gripped his collar and pulled him to me again, wanting to feel more of him. He sighed into me and I felt his knee between my legs as his tongue grazed along my lower lip. My heart pounded in my chest at his every touch. His fingers slid along my jaw and into my hair and his knee pressed further between my thighs. I let out a muffled moan-

He broke away, breathless. My lips were slightly parted as I gazed at him, at the frown making its way up his face and he let his head fall onto my shoulder, letting out a low, "Fuck".

"Eli, what-" I didn't get to finish as he pushed himself away from me and without another glance, walked away. I stood there, my lips still red and swollen from the way his lips were pressed against mine. And before I could stop it, the voice in my head was faster.

He regretted it.

Kissing someone like you, anyone would regret it.

I heard the library door open and close as he left as if he really did want to take back what he did. And something in me just...collapsed.

Eli's pov

Fuck.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

My heart was racing in my chest as if it was on some fucking marathon and I hurried down the hallways and out the door to the parking lot.

Fucking stupid.

It just happened. She looked so fucking innocent standing there, looking up at me with those eyes and parted lips. It didn't feel enough; I wanted more of her. I wanted her to tug on my hair and bite on my lip. I wanted her to moan into my mouth and pull me closer to her. But I was too much a fucking coward. I hated the feeling I get whenever she looked at me and how much I wanted her. This weird need to be with her was scary and unfamiliar.

Fuck, you idiot.

I ran a hand through my hair and a sharp pain shot up my torso as the bandage moved. I fucking kissed her and just left her, standing there.

Asshole.

But then again, when did I start caring about that stuff? I left too many chicks in bars and never looked back. But for some annoying reason, this was different. Different how I didn't fucking know. I got on my motorbike and revved up the engine, wanting to talk to someone. I rode onto the road and raced towards Asher's house.

I pressed the doorbell I don't know how many times in a row, enough for Asher to yell, "Bro, chill out, I'm coming", before opening the door.

"Oh, well, hello, babe. You look like you're horny and scared out of your life at the same time" Asher grinned as his eyes landed on me. I glared at him and pushed him aside, striding into the house. He closed the door behind me and plopped down on the sofa next to me.

"What's up?"

I let my head fall back against the back of the soft cushion and let out a frustrated groan. Justin walked out of the kitchen, a Doritos bag clutched in his hands and after seeing me, he sat down on the armchair opposite the sofa Asher and I were on.

"You look horny and scared out of your life at the same time," he said, taking out a Dorito and slipping it into his mouth.

I lifted my head and glowered at him, "I can't believe I came to you two for solace".