"I hope you change." You mutter under your breath, as I cry in your arms about how worried I was about you.
I feel you rub my back, rubbing small and delicate circles on my spine in a row. The feeling feels lovely to me and comforting in a way.."why would you want me to change?" I ask when I heard you muttering, I wipe my tears and wait for your answer.
I never felt more confused in my life before, why would you want me to stop worrying, caring about you and your safety?? I don't know what to do..so I just back away and go to our bedroom, locking the door behind me.
You go up to the bedroom door and try to open it, only to realize that it's locked, you think to yourself 'ugh..imma have to sleep alone in the guest bedroom because of this..' hours had passed since then maybe 3 hours actually...
You toss and turn in the bed as you struggle to sleep alone.. You hear faint crying as you try and sleep to no avail you can't sleep instead you get up and walk to the bedroom door opening it slowly with surprise that the door is unlocked..
"My love..are you okay?" You ask in a quiet voice, you walk to the bed realizing that I'm sleeping 'who the fuck is crying then if she's asleep?!' Then you see me crying in my sleep the mix of dry and wet tears on my face is pitiful to the human eye but you it isn't..you seem to have a look of sorrow like you see yourself as I cry like a child..
You wipe my face and lay next to me on the bed, I turn and hold you in my arms taking a sigh of relief..you squeeze me into your chest as you feel my breathing calm down and I slowly stopped shaking, my breathing was back to normal
You started to apologize to me as I slept in your arms "I'm so sorry that I said that I didn't mean it in a bad way I just didn't think it through about what I was saying and I know it shouldn't have happened and I'm sorry it did but please know that I love that you show you that you care and you worry about me." You feel me smile into your chest as I lay asleep in your arms.
Your apology had worked and you knew that I was awake and was quietly listening to you ramble about how sorry you were about making me cry, I knew you didn't mean it to hurt me, and that's okay you said it. I love when we both speak our minds on things
I lifted my head and kissed your cheek "thank you mi amor.. I think I'll never stop worrying and caring about you my lovely lady" I say with a smile, my grip on the back of your shirt loosens and I feel safe in this moment in your arms.. I feel like I'm a child again getting hugged, you know just how to make me happy and smile. I love that about you I always have and I will continue to love your hugs and kisses!
I love how we've grown together and funny thought us when we were like 13 would be proud that we're 23 and living together it's hard to realize but I always told you that I believe you would make it to your 20s and look at you 23 about to be 24 in 3 months! I have a whole dinner planned and I'm going to propose to you
You will never understand just how much I love you and how much I need you in my life to me that's okay that you'll never understand because I love you mi amore "you know you smell like flowers" you said randomly I pause and wonder 'what?' "Any specific flower" I muttered "no just flowers I don't know how to explain it at all" you shrugged your shoulders and I did the same "well you know you smell like burning wood in the best way possible, I love the smell and I can't get enough of it!" I exclaimed happily, the sun slowly sets as we continue to talk to one another
The clock reads 12:34 am it's so late in the night we have to sleep sometime tonight..the thought of sleeping doesn't walk through our minds as we talk about anything and everything together! My smile slowly softens as I fall back asleep in your arms..
You fall asleep sometime after me, somehow you fell asleep playing with my hair which was peaceful to me and it made me smile in my sleep.
That was the only time I could sleep
𝓢𝓪𝓶𝓮 𝓹𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓸𝓷 𝓭𝓲𝓯𝓯𝓮𝓻𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓼
