Not All Fun and Games

Chapter 38

Despite the cold water, his lips taste warm. Bellamy's arm that was holding my legs gently lowers them so that I'm standing. He leans into the kiss, moving his free arm to the back of my head and bringing me as close to him as possible.
Out of breath, I move my lips to his neck and suck gently on his smooth skin.
"Now that we're nice and clean, let's get out of here," he says, referring to the stream.
I nod and detach myself from him, which takes more effort than it should. He pulls me by the hand to a slope and we climb easily out of the river. He leads me to a patch of ground that is covered in a beautiful combination of flowers and fluffy moss, where he lies down and pulls me next to him. He brushes a loose strand of hair from my face before taking my head into his hands and pressing his lips back to mine.
"Clarke," he murmurs between kisses. "Before, when I said I loved you..."
"It's okay, Bellamy. It just slipped out. I understand," I cut him off. What he said made my heart almost pop out of my chest. But it just slipped out, he didn't mean it. I realize that.
He frowns, pulling his head a few inches away from mine.
"No, that's not what I meant. I do love you Clarke. I didn't say that by mistake."
My body stiffens and an army of angry butterflies suddenly fills my stomach.
He did mean it? He loves me?
Do I love him too?
The whole idea seemed foolish just days ago, but now it fills me with hope and happiness.
"Sure, don't feel the need to say it back," he teases after a moment of silence. "It's not like I just poured my heart out to you or anything."
I roll my eyes at him and laugh. "You are unbelievable, Blake."
He squeezes my arm and says: "I know. That's what you like so much about me."
"No, see that's not true. There are plenty of things I like about you," I tell him. "Plenty of things I love about you." I gasp at my own voice. The words seem foreign, especially when they're directed to someone that isn't family. I've never loved anyone this way. Not before Bellamy. And I hadn't even realized that I loved him until now. Have I loved him all along? Although the words fell strange, they seem right in my mouth. I know I didn't just say them because he told me he loves me. I love him, too.

I trace his collarbone with gentle kisses and his body stiffens slightly at every touch. He's smiling from ear to ear.
"Stop," he gasps. "You're tickling me!"
I laugh at his childish giggle and he wraps his arms tighter around me, bringing my face back to touch his. He pecks me lightly on the mouth and then slides his hands up my back, stopping at my bra clasp.
"May I remove this?" He asks innocently, batting his eyelashes.
"I told you never to do that again!" I joke, referring to his flickering eyelashes. "Sure, you 'may remove it'." I mimic his fake-innocent voice.
He bites gently on my lower lip as he unclasps my bra and removes it without difficulty. I find myself wondering how much practice he's had.
"Bellamy, I need to ask you something."
He frowns, concern lining his perfect facial features. "What is it?"
"Uh..." It's much harder to say now that I think about it.
He nods, prodding me to tell him.
My fingers run through his wavy black hair. I swallow the nervous lump in my throat and go for it: "How many times have you... Done... Um...It?" My voice is quiet and I can feel my cheeks heat up.
He plants a light kiss on my chin. "I'm not quite sure, to be honest. But none of the times were like this. It was never with someone like you. Clarke, you're the first person I've ever... Loved. In this way, anyway." His eyes are dark and beautiful. They look at me as if I'm some kind of angel sent from heaven, just for him, and I love it. I love everything about him.
"You?" He asks.
He seems to know the answer to his question just by reading the expression on my face. I've actually never really had time to date. I was so busy with my studies.
"Clarke, if you don't want this, you really don't have to—"
"Bellamy, I do want this."
Right now, it feels like I've never wanted anything more.
"Okay," he smiles warmly and brings his lips back to mine.
I get up on my knees and move on top of him, careful not to break our kiss in the process.
He moves his lips down to my neck, sucking lightly on my skin.
"Bellamy, if you give me a hickey for everyone to see..." I imitate a menacing voice but my giggle gives it away.
"Then every guy in the camp will know you're... occupied," he smirks.
"Pff, you think this means I'm occupied? Jeez, every time I tell a guy I love him, he seems to think he's special or something. Do you know how hard that makes things for me?"
At first, his expression is shocked. Then, as if in sync, we both burst into laughter. He shakes his head, sending drops of water flying through the air out of his hair.
Once our laughter dies down, I roll back onto my back and rest my head on his shoulder. Bellamy plants a kiss on my ear and then buries his face into my hair.
We lie together in silence. I'm sure we both expected more to happen, but I find I am perfectly happy in the state we are in now. I'll wait as long as I have to, as long as one day I can share the big moment with Bellamy. Even though he's done it before, I think he's looking forward to it too. He told me it's never been like this, never with someone like me. Never with someone he's loved. So in some ways, I guess it will be a first for us both.

This day has been perfect so far. At this moment, it seems as if nothing could ruin it. And I know that if something did happen, Bellamy would be right by my side to help guide me through it. I know he would.
And if that's not love, what is?