Switching sides

13

Camila

Tour Taylor and friend Taylor had two different personalities. It's like I was seeing the real her. She was more authentic and herself, not in a bad way but I felt like I was seeing the real her with ought her worried what people were going to think of her.

We came back to her hotel room and immediately she put on her pajamas that she had bought and threw on a zebra face mask. I tried not to laugh but she looked funny. That was before she pushed me into the bathroom demanding that I change as well. Upon exiting I see Taylor in the kitchen pouring herself a glass of wine.

"Isn't that stuff super bitter? " I say slightly cringing

She turns to look at me and smiled

"Come here let's take a photo," she says ignoring my comment about her wine.

I walk over and she pulled out her phone. Her arm snakes around my shoulder and she pulls me in so our faces are inches apart and snaps the photo.

"Perfect, now try this" Taylor says handing me the glass containing the wine. The rim already had a mark where she drank from and I couldn't help but taste the wine from the same spot.

"I like it," I say handing her the glass back

Maybe the wine was good, maybe I liked the idea of my lips touching where hers did.

Snap out of it Camila

"Can we watch Twilight?" I ask

"Duh," Taylor says and we make our way into the living area.

I see Taylor bring our snacks and set them on the table. It doesn't take us long before we break the snacks open and eat them, my stomach feels like it's going to explode if I eat more.

"Okay, can I paint your nails," Taylor asks in the middle of the movie.

"I ... uh why " I ask laughing

"Cause it's fun, it's the girly things people do at sleepovers " Taylor laughs getting up.

Moments later she's back with polish in her hands and turns on the couch to face me. She keeps Twilight on and sets the polish down.

"Which one do you want," She asks

She has a minimal selection, but my eyes land on the deep purple shade. Something about it calls to me. Or maybe it's the fact that Taylor's nails are also painted this color.

"This one," I say pointing to the purple.

Taylor smiles and grabs the bottle, setting the others on the coffee table. She opens the bottle and grabs my hand, tingles getting sent down it. Breathe Camila it's just something weird, ignore it. But the feeling gnaws at my stomach the longer she holds my hand. She's painting my nails and I can't take my eyes off of her. Her eyes focused on my fingers. Does she feel these butterflies too?

Stop

Camila, you can't have a boyfriend and you don't like girls, especially Taylor. I shove whatever my heart is trying to say and lock it up in a deep cave within my heart. Nobody will ever know.

But those feeling break out of the cage, clawing it's way back up my body until it has me in a chokehold in my throat. Taylor slightly bites her lip in focusing, her hands are gentle on mine as she moves to the next finger. I noice her thumb is slightly moving back and forth on the top of my hand and I try to stop looking.

But I can't

I think something is wrong with me, my emotions conflicting, is this normal??