Camila is in an abusive relationship, but nobody knows. What happens when her super famous boyfriend goes on tour with Taylor swift. What will become of their relationship With so many people around.
Taylor has been jam-packed with recording- editing and interviews the past week, and I hardly had the time to see her. I've been making myself busy with music and writing- something that makes me happy, and I'm a way I feel like I can control my emotions. Speaking of my emotions, therapy. I still go as I do think it is helping, especially with my thinking process and habits- it's good when I think I'm too good. I sit here in the lobby as I accidentally showed up early; it's a habit of mine. Alicia was still in session with another client, and I had to be patient.
I pulled out my phone and sent Taylor a quick text.
Cam: hey babe❤️ dinner tonight, wanna go out?
After I hit send, I opened up my Instagram app, and my stomach dropped. I haven't spoken to Taylor since last night because she was helping host snl live, and I did not want to get in the way or distract her. The photo I'm hunched over makes my stomach turn as my mind immediately goes into overtime- looking at every detail
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It's Taylor and that guy- the one she swore to me months ago that it was nothing and I was overreacting. But how can I not overeat now? When it's obvious. The way she's looking at him- her eyes. Hee holding his hand. I suddenly feel so sick.
* ding*
Taybay: YES BABE😘
Somehow, the words don't give me butterflies, and I don't believe what she's sending. Is she playing me, or am I the crazy one?
"Camila," Alice calls out from the door.
I can't feel my body- I don't want to move. What am I supposed to do? I suddenly can't breathe. The second I let someone in, I get hurt—every single time.
"Camila," Alice says again, her voice suddenly closer.
I want to crawl into a hole and die. My phone slips out of my hand, and I don't bother to grab it. I feel like I was stabbed in the stomach with a knife.
"Camila, breathe."
I feel a hand on my shoulder, and I jump. The hand is just Alice's, but I want an out-of-body experience/ I want to get away from all this.
I'm overreacting- she sold me it's not anything. Why are they holding hands? I can't breathe. I drop my phone and head it clatter to the floor, and this can't be happening. It can't.
"Camila, you need to calm down," Alice says, crouching to my level.
I can't think. I throw my head down in between my legs and calm my eyes shut.
" 1........2.......3........4.........5......." I shakily breathe
" That's it, Camila- your doing great," Alice whispers
