Broken

03

I stared blankly at my room's ceiling. I was think of how crappy my life was and what I did in the past to be born to an abusive rapist.
My tears had dried long after my dad had finished the deed. I wanted to kill myself.

I stood up from the bed and took the kitchen knife I had taped under my vanity. I placed the tip on my wrist and thought of slitting my wrist.
My hand was shaking and tears fell from my eyes.

If I do it,no one will know anyway. No one will miss me since I have no friends.

I fell onto the hardwood floor and cried my eyes out. I wanted to end it all. I didn't want to be raped by my own father like a slave neither did I wanted to end the week with a busted lip,a headache,a bruised rib or any of the other abuse I had to suffer.
I was hiccuping when my father walked into the room.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" He asked me. He sighted the knife on the floor and said angrily "You bitch! You're trying to kill yourself! Well if you want to die so much,let me finish the job!"

He took the knife and placed the tip on my thighs before slitting it.
Blood trickled down and I hissed in pain. I looked at the red liquid as it stained my white rug as well as my pyjamas.

"Clean up this mess"

"O-ok"

He slammed the door and I was left alone in the room.

                 °~°
A week passed in a flash and before I knew it,it was my wedding day. I was supposed to be happy but I wasn't. The cut I received hadn't healed and I had to conceal it with make-up.

I looked at the fishtail style wedding gown that had been sewn for me. I would have been happy wearing it if I was getting married to someone I loved.

My dad led me down the aisle, whispering things like "if you talk,I'll fuck you up!" Or "if you tell him anything,I'll kill you and dump your body in a river!" I nodded obediently whenever he said it. Tears welled up in my eyes but I bit my tongue to hold it back.

When Elron took of my veil,I forced a smile and looked at him in the eyes.
After the vows had been said,we were told to kiss eachother.

The only innocence I had left.

I didn't want to buy for the sake of my dad as well as myself,I did.

Everyone was cheering and tears I held back fell like the rain.

"See how happy she is!"

"Congrats Claire!"

I heard people say,but I wasn't crying out of happiness. It was out of fear. Fear for my mom. For what would happen to me.

"Keep this up and maybe,I won't fuck you up tonight!" I heard Elron whisper.
I felt a shudder ran down my spine when he said this. I wanted to run away. I wanted to tell them it was a like but I couldn't.

I looked at my mom one last time before getting into his car.

We didn't talk throughkut the whole drive and even when we got home,he changed his clothes and left. Totally disregarding me as a human being.

I was running. From someone. From him. I fell on the ground and was dragged into this dark room. He held my leg.
"Fucking release Claire!" He screamed. I was in tears. He didn't care. I was bleeding,he didn't care. He had this sadistic smile on his face. "You'll always be mine!"

I gasped for air when I woke up. My hair stuck to my skin and I couldn't breathe well.
"O-one...tw-two...the..three.." I couldn't get to four. My lips were quivering.

"Get the fuck off my bed!" I heard him say. I was too scared of myself to even look at him.

"You're my wife on paper. Not emotionally. I have no feelings for you and I never will. This is just a contract between your father and I." He told me without even caring about my feelings.
"You sleep on the floor. Below me."

I nodded and slept on the floor without even talking back. The floor was cold but I had gone through wors at my father's house.

*Click*

The light went off and the silence swallowed me once again. I was scared of closing my own eyes. This was the perfect definition of from frying pan to fire.

The next day,I woke up earlier than him,since I didn't sleep at all.
"Goo-good morning,Elron" I said with quivering lips.
He didn't even bother to answer me when I greeted him.

"Let's set things straight,Claire." He said when he finished dressing up. "I'm not your husband. I may be to the public eye,but to me,you're just a maid!" Those words cut through me like a knife but I had experience worse.

"Okay" I said calmly.

"We'll set some rules." He said. "It will be three. Firstly,you may not call me by my name when we're alone. Secondly,I have the free privilege to copulate with you anywhere,at anytime and any how I want to. And lastly,you'll be my escort when we go out. NOT my wife"

I nodded obediently. I guess this was my life now.