Burning Flames (Chicago Fire Fan-fiction) - Under Editing

Chapter 43: I Made the Call That Killed Her...

Matthew Casey's POV
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I don't go after Gabby knowing that she needs time. As we load the equipment up they pull Jones out. I look away, and get in the truck.
We drive off, and head back to the house. As we stop at a stop light I look over, and see we are right next to Chaplain Rolinski's office.
"Cruz, pull over here. I'll be right back, so wait here." I say to them as I pull my helmet off.
"Lieutenant, we can come if you want." Herman says as I get out of the truck.
I shake my head and walk in to the office.
"Hey is anyone with Chaplain Rolinski? A firefighter perhaps?" I ask the woman secretary sitting at the desk.
"Um... yes a female firefighter. She came in in full bunker gear, covered in soot and dust, and put her helmet down over in that chair. I tried to stop her, but she completely ignored me. Though, the Chaplain welcomed her, and didn't ask if she had an appointment like usual." She says to me as I pick up Gabby's helmet.
I nod, and take the helmet out to the truck.
With out a word I walk back inside. I knock on the door, and Chaplain Rolinski steps out shutting the door behind him. I see only a glimpse of Gabby sitting on the couch inside his office.
"Ah... Lieutenant Casey, what can I do for you? It'll have to be fast. I have someone in my office." He says to me.
I reply pointing towards the door, "Yeah, Chaplain. I wanted to talk to one of my firefighters in there."
"As I understand it, Lieutenant, she is no longer your firefighter. Boden, wouldn't let her work the call at Chicago Med since she was injured, so she quit and worked along side the department instead of on the department." He says to me.
I shake my head and say, "Two things, Chaplain, first off she has to give a two weeks notice, fill out the paperwork, and Boden has to finalize the paperwork. Second, she is my fiancé."
"Fine, come on. It's probably best that she has someone besides me." He tells me.
He opens the door, and I walk in. I sit down beside Gabby, and wrap my arms around her. She leans into me, and says with a cold laugh, "You smell good. Like Matt."
I hold her tighter as the Chaplain sits down in the chair across from us.
"Like I was saying , Gabriela, you need to lean on your family, and on the department. If you had been in Jones' position the same thing would have happened to you, and I know that she would not have wanted you to be upset over her death. Lean on your loved ones, Gabriela, and you will pull through this... Now, I would suggest going back to the hospital. I'm sure that, even though Chicago Med. is shut down, another hospital will take you. Maybe Chicago Union Hospital." Chaplain Rolinski tells her.
She clears her throat as we stand and says, "The doctor signed my release papers five minutes before the bomb went off. That's why I was in uniform already, I was about to head to the station. In fact the only reason I was outside the hospital was because I was walking out the door when the bomb went off. I was just outside the area that ruble hit. I think... I'm going to take your advice, and go back to the house. Besides, the cut on my arm can be closed up with some butterfly band-aids."
Chaplain Rolinski nods, and we walk out to the truck.
"Herman, ride up front." I say as we walk up to the truck.
He nods, and gets in the front. Gabby climbs in, and I sit in Herman's seat. Otis sits in Jones' seat, and I sit next to Gabby.
Her head falls back against the seat, and Otis asks, "What happened down there? I mean I know that the bomb was close to that wall, but why was Jordan so close?"
Gabby closes her eyes, and says, "Otis, that's for Mills, Severide, Jones, and I to know, and I doubt any of us will want to tell you..."
"What about your Lieutenant. He will have to find out for the report, and so will Chief Boden." Otis says his voice raising the slightest bit.
"Severide was acting Lieutenant for us down there. Lieutenant Casey only needs a generalization of what happened for his report, and I am pretty sure Boden already knows what happened, Otis. Do you think that her death was meaningless to me, that since I was her instructor that I have no feelings? If you do your wrong, you were not there when calls were made. You were not there when the wall blew apart, and buried her. I was, Otis. I watched her die, and it's my own fault. I made the call, and at the time it was our best option. I made the call that killed her. She lost her life. Ok? If I would have chosen differently I would be the one dead, and she would still be alive. Is that what you want? Tell me, so I can know what I should've done and bare even more guilt." Gabby says coldly as we pull up to the house.
We get out, and pull our gear off. Otis, is about to say something to her when she slams the compartment door shut, and walks off.
I lean against the truck and say, "Nice going, Otis. Might want to go track her down before she decides she's even more pissed off at you and herself."
He nods and walks off...