Tennessee Whiskey AU

CHAPTER THIRTY TWO

"I eat boys like you for breakfast, one by one hung on my necklace."

Scarlett's POV

Finally being able to tell someone about something that's been such a huge weight on my shoulders feels amazing. I wonder if I didn't want to tell anyone because that would make it real.

The cold hard truth is the chances of me ever having children are slim to non-existent. I'm not sure if I ever really thought about having kids. I don't think I ever wanted them. But when someone tells you, you can't it's so final. No room for change. You feel a little lost. I know my friends want children, and I'm left thinking what do I do then? Fuck, Lilly's already pregnant and my brother has another on the way, due at the end of this month. I would never want to take it away from them, but I don't know how I feel. Something you never knew you wanted but can never have anyway. Talking about it with Jay made me realise something else. This doesn't just affect me. Christ, I'm not saying it will affect Jay. But, maybe, hopefully, one day in the future it will affect someone. It will mean because they are with me, they lose that right to. Can I do that to someone else? And when is the right time to have that talk, when is the right time to tell someone that? The third date, the wedding day, anywhere fucking in-between.

"You ok there darlin', you zoned out on me there."

"Yeah, I guess things just on my mind. I'm sorry I'm ruining the mood of the day."

"Nothing ruined darlin'. I'm right where I wanna be, and as long as you are. That's all that matters."

"Well, I mean I would rather be back where I was about ten minutes ago." I smile and wrap my arms around him to pull him closer. I Can't help the fact that I seem to be drawn to this man like a magnet. Every inch of him to every inch of me. He leans in for a kiss and I'm lost. Every time his lips touch mine, he knows exactly what I need from him. Passion or his gentleness. He makes me feel so special, seen and cared for, all in a kiss. It might seem weird to have wanted to have sex with him after pouring my heart out, but I figured if he could do all that with a kiss, what could he do with more? I was way off the mark. What he just did for me was beyond incredible. I don't just mean the sex, but that was incredible, the man definitely knows what he's doing. But also, the fact that he knew how to read my body, what I needed to find the pleasure I wanted. He made me feel safe, cherished, worshipped, and dare I even say I felt loved. He filled my heart as well as my body. Maybe Erin was right, and he does have a magical cock.

"what's put a smile on your face?" I can't help but laugh.

"Erin thought you might have a magical cock with healing powers, I was just thinking I might have to agree with her."

"I'm not even going to," he says shaking his head but at least he's laughing too.

"I say we make a deal and never ask questions about what our friends do or say." He seems to think about that for a minute before finally answering.

"I think that seems like the road to hassle and confusion. Now feed me woman and I'll show you how magical my cock is."

"Have you not had enough of me yet? I must say I'm impressed. I've lost count of the amount of times we have had sex in the past twelve hours. Whatever little blue pills you're popping should be mass-marketed." I peck him on the lips, magnetized remember.

"Mmmmmmm, you're the only drug I need to keep my dick hard darlin', have been since I saw that shy little angel knocking back whiskey like water at Halloween." I like this side of him. The unfiltered, rough, sexy side. I feel like he's been holding back so much and ever so slowly he's releasing a little bit more of him. He's slowly figuring out that dirty talk and hard sex are not going to break me.