Pick 'n Mix {Mashton}

I'm Broken

Michael cuddled me for a while but then he got down from my bunk to pee and he didn't come back. 

"It's time for lunch." Michael huffs after a while, he moved from his bed and then looked over at me.

"M'not hungry." I mutter.

"You need to eat Cookie." Michael tells me, stepping up to my bunk.

"Not if I'm not hungry." I reply, Michael glares at me and then rolls his eyes.

"Fine, whatever but you promised Luke you'd see him for lunch." Michael says, this makes me groan so I sit up and jump off my bunk, pulling my loafers back on.

"Still not going to eat." I whisper, folding my arms over my chest, Michael scoffs and then walks out as soon as the door was unlocked I walked to the main room, finding Luke and Calum easily.

"Here you go Mr. Irwin." A guard says, handing me a plate with what looked like PB&J sandwiches.

"Don't call me that!" I yell at him, throwing the tray with the sandwiches away.

"Don't ever call me that! EVER AGAIN!" I scream at the guard, he just nods and walks away, so I kick the chair next to me and huff as I sit down.

"Kid's got some lungs." A man mutters. 

"Are you ok Ashy?" Luke asks me, I shake my head and lean my chin on my arms, looking up at Calum and Luke as they ate whatever was mashed up for them today.

"Mr. Irwin, Mr. Robins has told me you had a little outburst, do you need to go a private room to calm down?" Sinclair says, I glare up at him.

"DO NOT CALL ME THAT!" I scream, slamming my fists on the table.

"That's your name Mr. Irwin, what else do you suggest we call you?" Sinclair says.

"SLUT!" A voice calls.

"Call him Mrs. Irwin, bet he loves that more." Another voice calls. I felt my bottom lip tremble but I bit it and looked away from Sinclair.

"Mr. Irwin it is." Sinclair says, I could hear the smirk in his voice as a tear rolled down my cheek.

"Now Mr. Irwin, are you calm again?" Sinclair asks me, I stood up, kicking my chair back and standing up.

"I want to go back to my cell." I mutter to him, thanking my voice for not cracking or making me stutter.

"We can't let you back to your cell untill lunch time is over." Sinclair tells me.

"THEN TAKE ME TO THE FUCKING PRIVATE ROOM!" I burst out, not caring at all about swearing or the tears running down my cheeks.

"NO!" A voice calls out as Sinclair grabs my arm.

"He's going back to our cell, with me." Michael says, Mcihael grabd my arm and pulls me away from the guard. 

"Don't touch me." I growl at Michael, pulling my arm away.

"Ashton, calm down." Michael hisses back.

"I don't want you touching me." I repeat.

"If you go to that private cell other people will touch you and trust me they won't be nice." Michael tells me, he grabs my arm harshly and pulls me towards our cell, making me stumble over my feet a lot. 

"Now get on your bed and stop acting like a bitch." Michael says, pushing me into our cell. And that was it for me, hearing those words... those words HE'S said to me so many nights, so many times. I knelt onto the floor, my face in my hands as I cried. I cried my heart out, all the harsh words he's ever said to me, floating back into my mind. I shivered as I felt his touch, his big rough fingers on my skin, his lips on my neck. 

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" I scream as Michael grabbed my arm.

"Please, please don't." I beg, Michael let go of me and let me sit on the floor, crying for what felt like hours. I leant back against the wall, crying as I stared at nothing, just staring. I didn't know how long I'd been sitting there, night had come and gone I knew that, meals were brought in for Michael and I, he'd eat but I didn't. He left for a while once, he came back, I didn't bother trying to figure out where he'd gone. He might have told me but my mind was jsut a blur, all I could hear was static, all I could see was images of HIM... Him touching me, touching me where he should have never of touched me. 

"Ashy?" The soft tone of Calum broke me from my gaze, I blinked multiple times, my eyes hurt like a burning sensation. I looked up and saw Calum looking down at me.

"You ok buddy?" He asks me, and I was honest with him. I was so fucking honest for once in my life about how I felt. 

"I'm broken Cal, I don't know if I'll ever be fixed." 

AN/ Aww poor Ashy :( I hope we all have started to at least understand why Calum, Luke and Ashton are in jail... Full explanation will happen at some point but I don't want this story to go to fast. I feel sad for Ashton :s