Retroexposure

Chapter 10 - Getting to the 'Root' Of A Problem - Sleeplessly

Thursday 11th October 2007 2:53pm
Signed on today. And I still had flaming toilet issues! I thought I was getting over that. And, again, I was feeling sick. There were several occasions where I thought I was going to be sick. Went around town afterwards to get some shopping for mum, and the rabbit! I went out with a coat and jumper on, and I ended up sweltering! In the middle of October! This has certainly been the strangest year, weather-wise, that this country has ever encountered! It's not a fact; it's just my opinion! But it could be a fact!
Went online to do some Internet searches and forgot to do what I was intending to do online in the first place! Apply for a job that I knew was really pointless to apply for. Three weeks work? In my financial position (I have no money!), It's not really worth it. It would totally screw up my benefits, JSA and Housing. I need a more permanent job to apply for. As I've been saying in my JSA logbook – I'll just keep trying. Who knows, come January, There might be loads to choose from! 3:04pm

11:49pm
Just sent a joke to my local radio show. They were requesting jokes to make them laugh. If it made them laugh, then you have to send it to everyone in your mobile address book, if not then you have to delete it forever. Well the joke I sent wasn't mine originally. It was a friend of mine's joke. I'll repeat it here for your amusement, should you find it funny:
A visitor to a mental institution asked the director how he decided which patients should be kept in. The director said: "We fill up a bath, then offer the patient a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket. And then ask them to empty the bath tub" The visitor said, "Oh, I see. So a normal person would choose the bucket, because it's the biggest."
The director said, "No. A normal person would pull the flaming plug out. Would you like a bed near the window?"
The radio DJ read out the joke, but as he wasn't telling it to anyone specifically, i.e. his producer or another caller, I didn't know whether he found it funny or not, so I sent it to some of my friends regardless! I mean, I found it funny but then that's just my sense of humour! 11:59pm

Friday 12th October 2007 12:39pm
Why am I feeling so tired? I could barely get my head off the pillow this morning. I can't think it's because Mum woke me up at 5am this morning. The reason she did that is because yesterday, she had a very expensive trip to the dentist. She had to have a very difficult tooth extracted. Problem is, she had two very difficult teeth that needed to be extracted, and they only had time to just do one of them.
So last night after the local anaesthetic had worn off, she was in a lot of pain, which had kept her up most of the night. So when it got too painful, she got up to get some Bonjela that we had from the lounge. I was practically sleepwalking as I went down the stairs, not the brightest thing to do, go down stairs with your eyes shut! I was very unsympathetic to her pain. I guess because, in my mind, if it was me, I wouldn't disturb her if it was me in pain unless it was sooo bad that I needed an emergency service! Of course, I say that now, but once I do suffer that kind of pain, maybe my opinion might be different!!
Also I think I frustrate Mum because, I must confess, that I don't really look after my teeth, and I haven't seen a dentist for more than 15 years. Yet Mum does look after her teeth, sometimes cleaning them up to three times a day, and has needed fillings and allsorts of other dentistry!
So I went back to bed almost immediately, and Mum, whether she got back to sleep or not, I don't know, but she woke me up properly at about half 8 this morning. I was able to take Sven for his walk and see an episode of Heroes, before I suddenly felt absolutely exhausted. So I went back to bed with an incredibly thick head. I mean I'd taken my Modafinil, but that didn't seem to work at all. But hopefully, the Modafinil will have kicked in, and I won't feel so tired for the rest of the day. 1pm

Saturday 13th October 2007 10:58am
Feeling tired again this morning but this time, it is mostly my own fault. Mum's had another restless night due to her toothache, and the reason I had a restless night is because I watched a film till 4am! I didn't realise the time until the film had finished! The film wasn't even that good either. Mum is trying to see if she can get some emergency dental treatment over the weekend, as I don't think she'll be able to deal with it until Monday. I'll keep you posted, dear diary! 11:03am

Sunday 14th October 2007 12:32am
We had a quiet day today. Mum rested, as she hasn't been sleeping well, as you know. So while she was resting, I was playing my usual footie manager game and then later I watched the England vs. Estonia match. It was a great performance in the first half by England. Although I have to say that the best goal came from Estonia. They scored an amazing header from the edge of the area; it was just a pity that they put it into their own net! It was probably one of the best own goals I've ever seen. It's up there with Frank Sinclair putting the ball past his own keeper, Ian Walker from 40yards out. It's just a shame that they were both playing for Leicester City at the time!!
England won 3-0. I didn't see much of the second half as I was taking the dog for a walk. By the sounds of it, I didn't miss much as they didn't add to the goal tally in that second half.
It was a great day for England overall really. The rugby team beat France in the semi-final of the Rugby World Cup. Apparently they, England, weren't that highly favoured at this year's tournament, as they'd been playing quite badly over the last few years. But England had managed to beat France today and the mighty Wallabies, Australia, the week before. So next week, Saturday I think England will either face Argentina or South Africa. I think the Springboks are favourites to win tonight's semi-final.
Sadly, with Mum still not well, and me not able to get a lift to church, I'm going to miss seeing this kid at church, who last week said that although he's an England fan, he wanted to see France face South Africa in the Final. I just wanted to tell him to have faith in his national team, now that some of the best teams are out of the competition!
If England wins next week, they will be the first team ever to win back-to-back World Cups! Jonny Wilkinson got an O.B.E for helping England win the World Cup four years ago. After the way he's played in this year's tournament, if he kicks his way to winning the trophy next weekend, I think he deserves a flaming knighthood! 12:53am

1:33am
I had to come on and write this down, before I forgot it. I shouldn't laugh at Mum's expense in regards to her toothache. But I can't help it, I daren't go to her aid immediately, cos she'd think I wasn't taking her seriously. Just now was the exact situation I just described. She was banging her leg up and down so rapidly and hard; I thought she was trying to communicate with the rabbit! Then she was grunting and moaning with so much pain that she started to make sounds like a gorilla's mating call. She's becoming tri-lingual and she never realised it! 1:39am

3:48pm
Mum and I didn't make it to mass. So we planned to do the shopping a bit later on. However, Mum wasn't feeling too good, and she was worried about being able to drive the shopping scooter around the store. So we decided that it was best if I did the shopping on my own. I enjoyed it too. I've done the fortnight's shopping all on my own! Yay!! Result! I am capable of doing a large amount of shopping! I've been able to a week's worth before, but not a fortnight's! What can I say? I'm easily pleased!! Taxied it there and back. Mum was surprised at how quick I was. I didn't realise I was quick. I just don't waste any time, that's all.3:57pm

5:05pm
Got my agony uncle's cap on again. A friend is having difficulty getting over them splitting up with their partner. The partner's moved on and met someone else, while the friend has been left holding the baby, literally. I'm just there offering a shoulder to cry on, basically. I say shoulder, but we're only talking by text. Next best thing I suppose! 5:08pm

Monday 15th October 2007 11:39pm
For the second night out of the last three, I didn't get to sleep till 4am. The reasons for both? I was watching a movie. First night was a film called Eurotrip. I think it's a sort of sequel to Road Trip. Not that good really. Last night the film I saw was one that I'd bought earlier that day when I was doing the shopping. The film was The 40 Year-old Virgin starring Steve Carell. It was the funniest film that I'd seen in ages. Scarily though I could see a bit of me in the main character, Andy. If I don't sort my life out, I probably will turn into Andy. I'm going to watch the movie again soon, just for the audio commentary. Geeky, I know, but when I get films on DVD I always go for films that have loads of bonus features. Obviously, they are films I like anyway, but rarely do I buy a film that doesn't have bonus features.
Anyway, forget that nerdish paragraph! I took Sven for a walk at around 3pm this afternoon, and bumped into a few fellow dog walkers. Now the embarrassing thing is that I know the dogs' names but I don't remember who the owners are. Aslan, a giant poodle type dog was making a fuss of Ellie, a Rottweiler bitch. Aslan obviously thought that Ellie would be 'up for it' as he tried to mount her several times. But she wasn't having any of it!
However, when Sven took an interest, Ellie didn't seem to mind so much! They even sniffed each other's noses, which as well as sniffing backsides, is a way of doggy flirting, I think. I was making a fuss of Ellie myself – Not in that way you dirty sod! – When Aslan tried to show interest again. This time though, as I was sitting on my heels, Ellie backed herself in-between my knees, to protect herself! I thought she was cute for doing that. And she appreciated my help and licked my face! Since moving to this area, my opinions of certain breeds of dogs, like the Rotties and the Staff's have changed totally. I used to think that they could be vicious animals, but the ones I've met are all as soft as tripe!! It's not the dogs that are violent; it's the aggressive owners that make them violent if they are mistreated. Tuesday 16th October 2007 12:04am

10:29am
Strange. I couldn't stop dreaming about S last night. It's because it's her birthday today, I'm sure of it. I know we broke up two years ago, but the dream I was having last night felt so real. And because of that, I sent her a birthday text. I don't know if she still has that same number, probably not, but I didn't include my name in the text, so she might not remember that it's my number.
In my dream, I dreamt that I'd gone down to her house and surprised her. And she was pleased to see me. We talked about what we'd both been doing for the last two years, and I apologised for not being truthful with her when we'd split. We then decide to give each other another chance, and get back together. We kiss, and that's when I woke up.
Only the other night, I'd dreamt that I'd bumped into S at ASDA, and had pretty much the same sort of conversation! 10:44am

1:35pm
Just been to the dentist with Mum for 'moral support'. Turned out that she didn't need it because what she hoped to have done, will have to be done a week on Thursday. She was given some antibiotics that she needed, so I guess that'll help until then. The taxis there and back cost more than the prescription.
When we got home, a guy that I've got to know briefly since moving here, needed some help to get two worktops from his care into the house that he's doing up. He owns it, has rented it out, and I think he's either going to rent it out again, or do the place up to sell it. Anyway. He called me over and of course I agreed to help him. Five minutes later, he thanked me for my help and gave me £5 "for a pint" as a thank you. I didn't know pints had got so expensive these days! I thanked him back and went on my way. I wasn't expecting anything; I'd have done it for free. 1:44pm
　
10:39pm
Been an agony uncle again tonight. Same person with the same problem. She's been crying her eyes out all night. I just feel helpless, as I can't go round to her to give her a solid shoulder to cry on as I'm in a different city to her. But I actually spoke to her on the phone tonight. She was a little distracted with her 20mth old kid. She and her partner split less than a month ago and he's now shacking up with another girl around the corner from her. Talk about rubbing her nose in it. What makes it worse is that he's apparently ignoring his own child. What a despicable excuse for a human being. If my relationship broke down then, ok, I can accept that. But I could never abandon my kid. From what I understand, sadly, this whole sorry affair will not end happily. I'll try and keep you updated, the best I can, Diary.