To stop my mind from chewing through my heart, I could make my time useful, maybe practice an art
But I shelter away and hide from myself. I become anti-social and risk my own health.
I am no bulb but my switch has been turned off. I shut myself down, and down I may scoff.
Anything in my path even what was spared I take inside, eat it, then begin to feel impaired
I cry a little here, and I think a lot there. I eat food that's near after smoking a lot to repair.
Maybe I like the feeling, or maybe the lack thereof because my mind rests more when my heads way above.
Diets, pills, cleanses, and fasts... I've tried them all and none of them last. I wish it was temporary but this feeling won't pass I marinate in sadness until I chew very fast
Almost like it keeps me away from other forms of harm, I last another day. But I eat when I'm happy or I eat when I'm sad then I look at myself and start to get mad.
Then I smoke to change my brains weather, the more I cough, the happier state I endeavor. The happier place I explore and I think more clever
I just don't know if running away from my pain is running towards being better.
