You'll never understand my mentality
My mindset paints a different reality
Iniquity kills but it's not a fatality
It's just a test, she's testing my ability
Endurance, I run but I need more agility
They say I'm crazy, I don't need a facility.
Sometimes it feels like my brain is consumed
And my heart gets tight like I need some more room
All I will think and feel is the doom
And that's the point where I feel no more pain
I start to feel different like I'm going insane
Sometimes I can't even speak outside of my brain
And if you can imagine this join me
Sitting in a room hoping this feeling does not last
Hoping your own words will come out of this mask
Looking in the mirror all I see is "fat"
Wishing more than ever I could see past that
Falling to the ground, but it's hard,there's no Mat
Sitting, I can't cry, I'm on the cold hard floor.
Wanting to love but never hated myself more
And hoping nobody walks in the door
Because it kills me to be seen like this by family
Or really by anyone else who cares about me
Remember I am not sad, but smiles don't come free
They come at the price of none other
Yet we all blame it on eachother
When I feel this way though it feels like I'm another-
Well somebody else is controlling my day
And my hands are taken away
and my brain has too much fear to say
INIQUITY GO AWAY.
You still don't know my mentality
But at least you understand this part
And I'm sorry if you go thru this yourself
I'm sending you love from my heart.
