Notorious

La Douleur Exquise

I'm not a violent person, really.

I swear.

I've never hit anyone in my life, stepping on someone's toes makes me feel bad, I've only ever hit someone in the balls once -and it was Liam and it was an accident, hell I'd rather scoop up a spider and set it free than kill it.

But, sitting in a dingy restaurant, squashed between my brother and my ex, and having to watch Harry Styles shamelessly flirt with Amanda in front of me... well...

It's really the first I have ever daydreamed, so vividly, about harming another human.

It was one thing to invite themselves to join Louis and I for a drink, but it is a complete other to sit here for hours, listening to Harry's inappropriate jokes and Amanda's innate need to save humanity while trying to remain civil.

The only thing that is keeping me from ripping out her hair and crushing Harry's man-bits is the third Long Island Iced Tea I am currently guzzling.

"I just think that once we get rid of gasoline, then pollution will, like slow down, ya know?" Amanda is drunk. Very drunk and way too optimistic.

"You're so right. Our Earth will be saved. Everyone will skip around holding hands and singing Kumbaya once fuel is depleted. You are a visionary."

Louis snorts from next to me and I even see Harry hiding an amused smile, but Amanda is one shot of tequila away from passing out and is clearly too far gone to understand sarcasm.

"You're like, so cool, Aspen," hiccup, "No wonder Harry talks about you non-stop. The boy is practically obs-"

But, Harry's hand is over her mouth before she can finish the sentence that I so desperately want her to. He laughs uncomfortably and mumbles something about her having too much to drink just as Louis shoots me a raised eyebrow.

I know he is thinking about our conversation just a few hours ago about Harry fancying me, but I only shake my head. I know he doesn't from his actions and his own words. But, even if he did -I already made my choice.

And Harry's wandering hands along Amanda's body only reaffirms my decision.

I'm not about to give someone my time of day who rubs his flings in my face as some way to cover up his obvious (anger, hurt, betrayal?) in seeing me here with Louis and assuming the worst.

"So, Louis, I bet you're glad to be back in Aspen's good graces." Harry not-so-non-chalantly changes the subject and avoids my eye-contact.

He had been passive-aggressive about it all night. Making snide comments about my self-esteem and Louis' morals with no regard to my feelings. He had obviously wanted me to deny anything involving Louis and me, but I refuse to give him the satisfaction.

"Yeah, I am. Now, I want nothing more than to prove to her that I've changed."

Louis throws a casual arm around my shoulder and I see Harry's cold gaze follow the action, his jaw tensing in response. He scoffs lightly, shaking his head, and shooting me a look that screams disappointment.

Now, a sober minded (and maybe bit more mature) Aspen would correct Harry on his assumption that I am back with Louis and have cleared the air as soon as he walked through the door of the restaurant.

However, a very pissed off and slightly inebriated Aspen instantly told Liam and Louis not tell Harry about me rejecting Louis in favoring of torturing him a bit for showing up here with Amanda all lovey-dovey.

So, I may not be a physically violent person, but can be pretty manipulative and evil when I want to be.

It's the Italian in me.