Notorious

Disingenuous

Everything is calm.

It's almost too calm. The last few days since Harry and I told the others about our relationship we have been in a state of bliss; going out in public holding hands and giving each other light pecks and not caring that anyone can see.

Because everyone knows we're together we can do what we want. And we have been. A lot. Multiple times.

Everyone has been supportive apart from a grumpy Zayn, and Liam who still hasn't spoken to me. I haven't dared bring up Harry's desperate plea for me to stay with him no matter what, though it is constantly on my mind.

It's almost as if we're in a bubble. A bubble of peace and love and trust and I can't help but feel as if this bubble is ready to burst at any moment. That this bubble is made of lies that will tear us apart.

Lies that will potentially ruin everything and yet... The last few days have been calm.

No secret phone calls, no skittish behavior - just Harry and me being open and honest and I've never been happier.

And maybe that's why I'm scared.

Because every time that life seems to get good, every time that you are genuinely happy and everything seems to be going right... BAM! Something happens and your world crashes all around you. Life knocks you back down to reality.

Being happy terrifies me.

And then like a sign, the door knocks.

And I know it's not Harry because he knocks to 'shave and a haircut' and this knock is three abrupt taps on the wood of my door in a quick succession.

It doesn't take a genius to figure out who is on the other side.

"Liam, to what do I owe this displeasure?" Before the sentence is even out of my mouth my burly brother shoves past me and into my apartment only stopping to pet Yoda before rounding on me.

My distaste for him at the moment only rises when I notice that he is uninjured while Harry is still trying to heal his bruised nose that is slightly swollen, very purple, and a little crooked.

"Sure, come in Liam. Why don't you have a seat? Eat my food? Hit my boyfriend some more."

He makes a disgusted face, "Is that wanker here?"

"No, he's not. If he was, trust me, you would know."

He nods in approval and begins to pace back and forth against my hardwood, Yoda following his every move and yelping when he is repeatedly ignored.

My dog better not like him more than me too, I can't take that kind of rejection.

Liam's phone lets out a shrill ring, but when he glances at the screen he is quick to silence it and stuff it back into his pocket. When he notices my questioning stare he answers my unspoken question, "That was mom."

"Wow, momma's boy of the year is ignoring her calls, what did she do now?"

But, Liam only shakes his head at me, chewing on his lip, and continuing to pace the floor. This action only twists the knife in my stomach deeper because Liam never, ever ignores her calls. He might miss them when he is at dinner or his phone died.

But, to actually decline her call? Something isn't right there.

He doesn't want to talk to her when I'm around? They fought? Who knows, but it doesn't help ease the anxiety I'm filled with.

When I fear he will burn a path into the floor I press my hand against the sleeve of his sweater, "Liam, what is going on with you lately?"

His reply is instantaneous, "You need to break up with Harry."

I pull away as if he had scalded me, knowing this is why he came, but hoping it was for another reason. I can't deal with this right now, if ever.

"Can you enlighten me please? Maybe tell me why you are so against us being together?"

And just like I thought he would, his gaze falls to the floor and he becomes uncomfortably quiet. I groan exasperatedly, running a hand down my face and trying not to throw something at him.

He and Harry are one in the same really -always evading my questions. Yet, expecting me to do what they ask.

"I love him, Liam."

This confession has the intended effect and Liam literally freezes in place, face paling and expression so horrified you would have thought I told him I murdered a village of puppies.

"You... You what?"

"I love him."

He shakes his head furiously, "No. No, you can't," he strides toward me, gripping my shoulders tightly and searching my face, brown eyes swimming in dread and what looks like guilt, "Please tell me you're lying. Tell me you're not... In love with him."

The desperate words only strike fear in my heart and I can feel myself being dragged deeper into the sea of doubt. I cling onto his forearms, my whole body beginning to thrum with the panic I feel about all of these hints and cryptic words and secrets.

"You would tell me, Liam," I choke on my words and my fingernails dig into his flesh, "You would tell me if there was something going on right? If there was something I would need to know, you would tell me?"

And I can almost see it - the exact moment that Liam's resolve cracks. His shoulders droop and his eyes fall and I know my trust, my desperate plea has broken him. When his eyes finally drag up to mine again, they are filled with remorse and it makes my stomach fill with trepidation.

"Aspen, I-"

But, we are interrupted by a knock in the form of 'shave and a haircut' and I feel my chance slipping away just as Liam steps back.

"Liam, wait please!"

But he's already built up that wall again, glaring at the door as if wishing he could burn a hole into it.

"That's him isn't it?" He doesn't even wait for my reply before he is heading towards the door, "I should go. Just... Trust me when I say that you shouldn't trust everything he says."

I latch onto his arm in a pathetic attempt to stop him -in an attempt to finally learn the truth, but he is much stronger than I am and just drags me along with him as he wrenches open the door.

The grin that was on Harry's face falls instantly at the sight of my brother and I only let go of his arm to watch the standoff between the two boys. The boys that mean so much to me - that I love dearly for two entirely different reasons but seem to be hiding something perilous from me.

Rage rolls off of Liam and he squares up to Harry with a scowl and threat in his eyes I don't entirely understand. While, Harry glares up at him as well, but his is full of fear and imploring and I don't know which one is worse.

"Liam."

"Harry."

I don't know how long we stand there with both boys just staring at each other as if silently communicating something, but finally Liam lets out a harsh huff and pushes past Harry, knocking into his shoulder aggressively before continuing down the hall without another word.

Harry clears his throat, pushes his hair back and takes in a long breath as if calming himself before he speaks again.

"What was Liam hear for?"

And the question would have seemed innocent under any other circumstances but considering what Liam and I just almost discussed, I know Harry is digging to see if Liam spilled any of his tea.