Notorious

Inhibitions

In my vast experience I have learned that there are five types of drunk people; the overly emotional ones, the giddy ones, the flirty ones, and the philosophical ones. And after another successful rehearsal that resulted in cracking open Niall’s extensive liquor collection, I can’t help but place each one of my bandmates into this category.

Niall:

Niall is an emotional drunk and I can’t really say I am surprised. As soon as the bottle of whiskey touched his lips it was like Niall got stuck by cupid. He clambered up to Harry just as he came out of the bathroom and practically tackled him to the ground.

“You know, I don’t get why Aspen hates you so much,” He slurs and Harry raises his eyebrows at me in amusement while I hide my blush, “Well, you are a bit of a fuckboy, but I quite like you! You’re funny and you brought us cake, what more could we ask for?!”

Of course this was a sweet confession and Harry did recuperate the fondness, but it was only a half hour later that Niall was back to almost tackling Harry on the couch.

“It’s just unfair that you’ve got the dimples, the voice, and the hair,” His fingers reach up to tug on the wild curls and Harry winces, “How in the fuck do you get your hair like that? It’s so unfair. You know what, never mind, I hate you. It’s not fair that you steal all the good looking broads away from us mere mortals.”

Liam and Avery had to practically drag Niall away from a laughing Harry after that.

It was only two minutes later as Harry telling me a dirty joke that Niall shuffled up to Harry, looking down at his feet and playing with his fingers. When he looked up he had tears swimming in his cerulean eyes, “I’m surry, Haz. I act-actually do looove you, mate. I didn’t mean it.”

Avery and Liam:

It also wasn’t surprising that both Avery and Liam ended up being the giddy-sunshiney ones. They so graciously made the six of us Jell-O shots, and then so graciously ate them all themselves. Jell-O shots are basically like candy heroin for mushy people like Avery and Liam. Eating them all had the duo acting like fucking Carebears for the rest of the night.

They spent a majority of the night laughing hysterically at every joke Harry made –much to his delight. And even came up with a few of their own that were not really jokes and more like observations that mostly all sounded something like this:

“What do you get when put a banana between two oranges? Genitalia!”

Even Harry cringed at that one.

I swear you could stab them both repeatedly in the stomach and they would thank you for not aiming for their faces. The two were scarily perfect for each other if they would just admit they liked each other.

The other half of the night was spent watching the two idiots as they danced to every song that came up on my phone. And I discovered much to my pleasure –and slight horror- that both Avery and Liam knew the entire dance to ‘Everybody’ by The Backstreet Boys.

I just want to personally thank Zayn for videotaping the performance for future blackmail.

Zayn and Harry:

I wasn’t necessarily surprised to find out that both Harry and Zayn were flirty drinks. No, what did surprise me was that they both chose to flirt with me.

I still am not even close to being friends with Harry, but that doesn’t stop him from trying to make a move on me constantly. However, Zayn and I have been friends for years and he hasn’t expressed interest in me once. Granted, I was dating Louis up until about six months ago, but even then he didn’t try anything. Well, up until now.