SUMMARY:
Ray- lonely, rich, alcoholic but gorgeous playboy meets Yok- financially strapped, talented artist and hot, handsome rebel accidentally one night while Yok is vandalizing the walls of Ray's old, abandoned mansion where his mother had di...
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🚨Trigger warning: Attempted Sexual Assault depicted in this chapter.Please feel free to skip if you find this uncomfortable.If you find yourself a victim of anything that falls under this crime, please contact the proper authorities or talk to people you trust.
BOSTON
The ice that ran in my veins the moment Yok's last sentence registered in my brain was almost paralyzing. It left his mouth before he walked away, never looking back. I stood there watching Ray and Mew's affectionate encounter, broken permanently when Top emerged from the house to call Mew to go.
Ray was finally alone again, the usual pained expression on his face when he thought no one could see was present.
The first time I felt I was different was during the time in the camp when the picture that Ray kept on insisting to throw away was taken. We were probably around 6 then. Ray was smiling so brightly as we explored the camp and I couldn't help the strange feeling I get when he smiles like that and the possessiveness that was almost feral whenever other kids in the camp wanted to get close to my pretty bestie. As the years passed and we grew up, I finally saw the truth when I did everything I could to keep Ray by my side and to make sure to be the only one who gets to stay close to him. Anyone who wanted to be close to Ray immediately became my enemy. It was also during this time at middle school that I started to experiment with my sexuality.
At this time, Ray had not opened up about his own, remaining non committal and never expressing like or dislike for any gender. I had assumed he was straight but just lazy to make a resolute declaration or else fearing the consequences, like I do, if my father ever finds out about my preference. So I had kept my own feelings to myself and dated as many people I could get my hands on. Yet none of them ever managed to bump Ray off the pedestal I had placed him.
Eventually, the summer before senior year, Ray had fallen in love with a guy who just transferred to our school. The guy turned out to be a douche but to him, Ray had given his virginity and the unlimited use of his black credit card. That was an eye opener for me. I had hesitated so long that I lost my chance. Even if Ray was devastated when they broke up, I was gleeful thinking I could finally make him see me more than just a friend. But Ray had jumped from one man to another, even including a few women in between. I'm gay one hundred percent but apparently, Ray is bisexual and more devastatingly, never saw me beyond the friendship that we have.
This had caused me to eventually feel hopeless and in despair that I tried to distance myself from him; spending the summer at the gym, almost all my free time; coming up with the excuse that I wanted to get a better body before we started college and relieved when in college we met Mew and Cheum. Now Ray had less time to look for me but the situation eventually bit me in the ass because my heart still screamed for Ray but he was now occupied with Cheum and mostly Mew, leaving me feeling almost left out and ignored. I often wished we could go back to just being Ray and Boston. It was my own doing, so it was a consequence I had to bear for pushing Ray off my life.
