Chapter Nine - Growing Up is Overrated

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We make it to Santa Monica as we walk through the crowd of police, first responders, and detectives

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We make it to Santa Monica as we walk through the crowd of police, first responders, and detectives. "How many cops are there in LA?" I ask Spence knowing he will have the answer.

"City or County?" He questions looking at me as we walk.

"Wait, you actually know the answer?" JJ says in shock. "I know both answers" He states as the three of us continue to walk.

"So hot." I say absentmindedly, my eyes widen once I realize I in fact said that outloud. JJ chuckles trying to cover her smirk. Spence just looks at me with a wide grin. I put some pep in my step to distances myself from him and my utter embarrassment.

When I step inside the house an EMT is just packing up her things and leaving when Derek starts to stand. He's got a taped up gash on his forehead, bruising is already starting on his left eye. He looks like he's in no shape to be working let alone standing. JJ and Spence come in right after me. "Derek..." she says in shock.

"I'm all right." He tells her, but he's struggling.

"You don't look all right." Spence points out.

"Reid, drop it." He snaps. Spencer whispers out an apology.

"The local bureau office found us these satellite phones. It should bypass any outage problems on the ground." JJ says changing the subject as she hands out the satellite phones. Everyone is just standing here, except for Kurzbard and Matt.

"Matt? Is he okay.....any word on Kristin and Ellie?" I question. Everyone looks down at the mention of Matt, making my stomach twist.

Derek gazes at me without a word before sliding past me and out the door. I look over to Hotch and Rossi for answers.

"Sunny." Rossi begins. I knew it the moment he spoke. I've come accustomed to that tone......know it better than I should. I shake my head.

"No....no.....I was just talking to him. He.....we....." I trail off. Spencer puts a hand on back trying to comfort me. It was stupid, I shouldn't be feeling this emotional over a man I just met. But here I am feeling the weight of his death.

"We just made plans for coffee....this can't be real." My voice shaky, my bottom lip wobbling. I'm trying desperately to push my emotions down.

"Kristen was beaten and sexually assaulted, Prentiss went with her to the hospital. The unsub took Ellie, there was another couple murdered a mile from here an hour ago. They already have a team there, we're sure it's the unsub." Rossi tells us, Hotch steps out of the room to follow Derek.

The ride back to the precinct was silent. Sadness and anger were building inside of me. Part of me wondering if it didn't have more to do with my past...I started this case barely sleeping haunted by my memories.....

"It's not fair." I say breaking up the silence in the car, my head resting against the window of the backseat. "Ellie has no grandparents....her mother is flighty at best from what Matt told me...." My chest tightens when I say his name. "Her aunt will be lucky to make it through the night.....she will have no one.....the people who made her feel safe and loved are now gone....her life forever altered. She's just a kid. No one deserves this but especially a kid. Carter...Ellie.....It's just not fair." I wipe away a tear before apologizing for being emotional.

Cardigans and Converse // Spencer ReidWhere stories live. Discover now