Sunday Finnegan is the definition of chaotically detailed. She is powered by coffee thanks to her addiction of reading smutty books till 3am, cheerfully goofy and optimistic to a fault.
She's fresh out of Quantico and already has her first big girl...
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We are all standing together in the command center, our live feed has been cut. Keeping us from knowing if Will is okay or not. It's just silence and the static of the tv behind JJ as she leans against the counter stunned. If that would have been Spence, I don't think Derek would have been able to hold me back.
"Did you see where he was shot?" JJ breaks the quiet, her eyes full of unshed tears. "Is he alive or dead, Garcia?"
Pen looks at her devastated, "I don't know."
"He was wearing a vest." Emily tries to reassure her. "He might be ok." Pen and I both nod in agreement.
"Might be." JJ lets out a small scoff in disbelief.
Rossi comes walking in to the command centers small hallway, "They're not answering." He states. JJ gets up from her leaning position.
"All right, we need to get inside." She demands.
"JJ, it's too risky. We don't have eyes in there anymore." Derek tries to reason with her. But nothing will convince her otherwise. I would be the same way, except I wouldn't accept no for an answer. The lengths I would go terrify me....makes me wonder if I have more of my father inside of me than I realize.
JJ looks over to Hotch with a pleading look, "Aaron..."
"Let's go in." He advises, he turns to me "Strauss has cleared you."
I nod my head acknowledging him. I can work in the field again, it's been months. It feels almost foreign to me now, the idea of walking into danger once more. I can't help questioning if I'm really ready. I see all the work I've been putting in with Dr. Craver has healed parts of me I didn't realize were so broken. Not just with Jude, but with my childhood. But I'm not done, we haven't even scratched the surface of what happened on New Years. Did Craver sign off on me being cleared? Does she believe I'm ready? My mind was a swirling mess of questions that wouldn't be answered until everything was said and done.
Everyone starts to follow Hotch out of the command center, I stop right by Penny her eyes searching mine. "Don't let Spence know that I've been cleared. If he knows..." He would worry.
She nods her head understanding. "Be careful...all of you." She squeezes my arm before I jog towards the rest of the team. My nerves were hitting my stomach with a force, I'm not so sure I am truly ready.
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