Chapter 29: Anxiety.

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It's hard for people to talk to someone they don't know. The anxiety, the sweating, the nervousness, everything that's associated with talking to a stranger. You get this horrible feeling, your heart is literally bursting out of your chest. The room feels suffocating, like the walls are closing you in, tying you into this room forever. This is what Jay was feeling right now, he started going to 1-1 meetings with Dr. Charles after his downfall after Erin left and Abby entered into his life. Also, voight had pushed him to do so, a few months Erin had left he started to go to group meetings, then it turned into a 1-1.

" what's bothering you?" Dr Charles questioned, as Jay looked at him after staring the world " we have had numerous of meetings, and you have started to open up with me.. what's going on today"

Jay thought about it for a moment, before opening his mouth " the uh nightmares I used to have before was about the war and Erin when she was in New York are back, now they are about Erin again.. they had stopped when she came back"

" does Erin know?" He questioned about his former paitent. To that question, Jay shaked his head.

Dr Charles, asked a follow up question " and why not?"

" she uh, with her condition. I don't have the heart to tell her... I don't want her to over think and worry... because I know her. When I first had them, she would calm me down. But now, she sleeps deeply, because of her cancer, and the side effects of chemo. So she doesn't hear me" Daniel nodded his head, he knew what chemo would do to a person.

" she's stronger than you think Jay, heck she's a stronger person than both of us combined" Jay nodded his head to what Dr. Charles was saying, it was true. Erin is one of the strongest people he has ever known, she overcame her shitty childhood, she turned herself around and now she's beating cancer, but telling her about this would only stress her out more and he knew how much of an overthink she was.

Dr Charles question had brought him back to life " what were the nightmares about?"

" I would have this re occurring dream... that we spend  a wonderful night together, happy with our life.. talking about our life together.. we go sleep, and then I wake up but when I look over she's not breathing anymore"

" Jay this is common, when you have someone who you love with all your heart and you find that they have a condition that's making them suffer, these things makes you look a life more deeper than usual.. what I think is that you have to speak to Erin about this.. you need to talk to her about your past nightmares you have had of her.. this is the only way that the nightmares will not be nightmares" he shared his wisdom " you also told me that, you both would never keep secrets anymore because that's what broke your relationship last time" Jay leaned back on the couch, and pondered into what dr Charles had said. He has to speak to Erin, because she was the only one that could help him get through this. But he also didn't want to trouble her, but he knew that if he didn't tell her then he would be breaking his promise.

Kim existed her her car with Erin in tow. They had come to get wedding dresses for Kim, as she had set her wedding date for next month " I can't believe we're both getting married" Kim's voice was laced with excitement.

" it really is mad isn't it!" They both entered the store and Kim started to try on wedding dresses. The 4 dresses she had tried on she didn't like them but the final one Erin was excited for this. Kim came out of the changing room and presented herself.

"So what do you think?" Her best friend questioned her maid of honour.

Erin's eyes widened in awe, as she saw her best friend coming out with the perfect wedding dress. The sleeves were decorated with beautiful concrete designs with silver lining, the top half was naked, but with a white padding for her breasts, and it flowed down.. just like Kim wanted.

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