Chapter 20 - Nowhere to Call Home

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Astrid sits on the floor of her bedroom with her legs bent up to her chest while her chin rested on her knees as her mind was far away in thought

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Astrid sits on the floor of her bedroom with her legs bent up to her chest while her chin rested on her knees as her mind was far away in thought.

Astrid couldn't fault her husbands when it came to their admission as they had indeed been honest with her when she had questioned them on their feelings, not only tonight but all the other times in the past. 

Except for Klaus. 

But she was starting to realise that whatever horror Esther and Mikael had put him through, on top of her death and Loki's, had left a wound that ran deeper than she could have imagined. 

It was as if his soul had been scarred, forever marked by the pain he had endured.

Astrid could see it in his eyes whenever he looked at her, a mixture of longing and fear. It pained her to witness the turmoil within him, knowing that she alone couldn't heal the scars that ran so deep.

But to honest, Astrid had her own scars and wounds in her soul that she had been ignoring in order to deal the pain of those she loved before putting her own out there.

So, she had buried her own pain, locked it away in a hidden chamber of her heart, afraid to confront the demons that lurked within.

Astrid reaches her hand up to her right shoulder and her fingers trace her birthmark, the mark of her family. I wonder what had happened to them, to her father.

Had he thought that she had abandoned him and run off with the Mikaelsons, leaving him behind with no one? Or had one of the brothers informed him of her death before they fled?

She shook her head, trying to dispel the painful thoughts that threatened to overwhelm her. It was useless to dwell on the past, on the unanswered questions that plagued her mind. Whatever had happened to her father, she couldn't change it now. 

And as much as she longed for closure, she knew it was time to let go. 

Astrid had always been one to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders, taking on the burdens of others without hesitation. But now, as she sat in the stillness of her bedroom, she realized that it was time to prioritize her own healing.

Astrid moves her arm down again, wrapping it around the front of her legs as her gaze moves the softly burning fire.

Her nightmares had dulled now that she found one of husbands has snuck into her bed in the middle of night, but that didn't mean they had disappeared altogether.

She didn't think they would ever leave her to be in peace, especially with what had happened when she was in limbo.

Astrid is knocked out of her thoughts when the door to room opens and the perpetrator stands in the doorway, watching her. 

She doesn't move her gaze from the fire but she moves her legs down to the floor and leans back fully against the bed before she speaks, "Do you know that I don't know how I died?"

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