A/N: Credit to Renowned-Wolf for helping with a few things.
Scene opens on you, Loona, and Moxxie in IMP's office. Loona has an arm wrapped around you and is pressing her snoot against your cheek. Moxxie awkwardly tries to make smalltalk.
Moxxie: (softly claps twice) You know, I checked the scale today. (inhales) And it said I lost two pounds this week.
Loona rolls her eyes.
Moxxie: I...am not...FAT!
Cut to the front door kicked open by a furious Millie as she stomps around the office, mumbling angrily.
Millie: (mumbling angrily) Ooh! Such a fucking asshole! That little motherfucker. I just wanna take my finger up and shove it up his fuckin' little thing!
Upon coming up to the table, Millie slams her coffee cup on the it disturbing you and Loona. Millie then passes Loona and hits a button titled "Nut button!!" that summons a cardboard cutout of a human saying, "Hi! I'm a Hooman!" then throws a knife and lunges at said cutout. Moxxie looks at her, disturbed.
Moxxie: Millie, honey. Is everything okay?
Millie hisses back at Moxxie in response, disturbing him even more.
Y/N: I'll take care of it. You'll be hard pressed to find someone who can resist this.
Moxxie: What do you-
You walk up to Millie and do this.
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Millie and Loona: (entranced) So...cute...
Millie snaps out of rage-fueled state.
Y/N: Is everything ok, Mom?
Millie: Yeah. Just...bumped into an ex. (tail twitches)
Moxxie: Oh! Oh...
Millie: (retracts knife) He just kept going on about how he has money now, "a bright future," and "a bigger cock".
Y/N: Wait, what?
Millie: (raises voice) Every time I see his stupid face, I can't help it! I just need to—
Millie punches the filing cabinet beside her in frustration. Blitzo enters the room on his phone shortly after.
Blitzo: What the fuck is all this noise? I got a client!
Moxxie: Sorry, sir. I'll get this all cleaned—
He holds up a photo of two imps making out in horse suits.
Moxxie: What is this?
Blitzo: Uh, research! For science!
Y/N: If you're gonna keep a big stash of porn, at least digitalize it and put in a folder labeled "homework". Oh wait, you're an adult.
