On Purpose

~35~

     I sat at a booth in the diner, waiting for Isabelle. We both decided to wake up early to have a one on one conversation together without her sister ear hustling or Kyle interrupting.
    I checked my watch three times already and even sent her four messages. Nothing.
    Just as I was about to get up, I spot her. She's scanning the diner for me, so I raise my hand.
    She strolls over to me wearing a plain white shirt and red and black checkered pajama pants. Her hair is in two low ponytails that look cute due to her short hair.
    "Hey." I say, feeling awkward.
    "Hi." She looks down.
     I didn't know what to say to her, maybe tell her I like her? Maybe tell her I want to be in a relationship with her but I'm scared to be skinned alive by her sister.
    "How are you holding up?" She asked, her fingers trailing the edge of the table.
    "Oh, better, much better." That was a shitty lie, I felt like God slapped me right across the face this morning with a beautiful affirmation: Today you are jobless.
    "Hey, if you need anything—"
    "I'll be fine, Izzy." I don't know when I started calling her that, she clearly didn't either because she leaned back in her chair with her head tilted to the side.
    "Miss. Purpose." I correct myself, but her reaction is the same.
    "What's your favorite color?"
The question made me look around for cameras.
    "I beg your pardon?"
    "Your favorite color, what is it?
    "Red."
She nods then says nothing else. 
    "What was the reason of the question?"
    "No idea." She says.

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Kyle was sitting up when I got into our hotel room. He was snacking on one of my Nature Valley bars.
"Sup." He said, he sounded like Kyle, but didn't look like Kyle. His hair was messy, he says uncomfortably in the bed with his back to the headboard. He looks like he could vomit any second and yet he stuffs his face.
"Hey, how're you feeling?" I asked, making my way to his bed.
"Good. Did I wake you up last night?"
In honesty. No, but I said, "yeah, you were snoring like a hog last night." He laughs, but sits up.
"You're not gonna tell Heaven, are you?"
"Why would I tell her that you're being a grown man?" I asked, my brows frowning in confusion.
"I dunno." He said blankly and looks down.
    I don't say anything to him, we just sit and watch whatever was on the TV.
Law and Order.
    I kept thinking about my job, losing it after putting three years of my life into it. What about Stacey Green? What about her husband?
    I know I have to help her, I made myself a promise I was going to help her and see that logo on TV and be proud of myself. Now what? It's all over because my excuse of a boss just ups and fires me because he's bored?!
    "Olly, you good, man?"
My eyes trail away from the carpet and into Kyle, he was playing with the Nature Valley wrapper. Bending it, rolling it like a cigarette and then crumbling it up into a ball.
    "Huh?—oh yeah, no, I'm good." I say with a nod, he made it seem so awkward because he didn't say anything after that. All I could hear was a man crying because he killed a woman and he was going to jail for it.
    "You should tell her." Kyle said finally. I looked over at him again, blinking and replying what he just said a million times.
    "What?" I then said.
    "I know you like her, her sister knows—hell, even the seven year old knows you like her."
    "Seven and a half." I correct him.
    "Shut up." He shot at me, then sits up in a better position.
    "Point is, you two are so madly in love with each other that it looks toxic."
    "How much did you have to drink last night?"
    "Shut up, Olly." He said, sounding serious which made me feel uneasy.
    "I know how it feels to love someone and not being able to have them in your life. You love Isabelle. Is it too soon?—yes, probably—but is it stupid to take a chance and call it love?—fuck no." I looked down at my feet, my sock had a hole near the ankle which made me want to crack up laughing, but Kyle was having a serious conversation with me, and I'd be an ass for laughing during a serious moment.
    He goes on. "I have a daughter, did you hear me? I have a fucking child and I'm not aloud to hold her, to teach her about life. I can't sneak her sugar when her mom says no, I can't hear her say, 'hey daddy, look at me!' "
    I knew he was still a bit drunk, which is why I took everything he said into consideration. I've always heard people say people who are drunk tells the truth and nothing but the truth, I guess I was getting a front row seat for it now.
    "It hurts me. I had a chance to be a father but I left Mariah to be with Heaven. A woman who lies to me all the time and flirts with my friend right in my face." He paused, then looks up at me, his hand gripped the Nature Valley wrapper so hard it stopped making the crinkling sound.
    "So if you love Isabelle, if you actually love her, you'll tell her. Or you'll live with regrets like me. You'll end up sleeping with them and then marry them and say that you're happy but really you're dying inside."
    I sighed, not knowing what to say now.
    He sniffed which made me look at him, tears poked at his eyes and he looked away.
    "I'm not crying because you're probably a virgin who's in love. I'm crying because I'm tired of living with regrets."
    I tapped his leg. "So let's make a deal: I tell Isabelle how I feel, and you sort your life out. Go be a dad to your little girl, tell her the truth and talk to Mariah."
    He looks at me for a long time, maybe ten seconds longer than I expected him to, then he nods.
    "Deal."