Pity the living- Slytherin boys (part 2)

What you wanted

Alice's pov

I smoke by the black lake.

I can't help the tears falling from my eyes until I hear very familiar sounds of laughter and wipe the tears away.

"Leave Alice." Theo comes up to me.

"I was here first." I say.

"Leave." He speaks through gritted teeth.

"Fuck. You." I sternly say.

He quickly grabs my shoulders and pushes me against a tree.

"What the hell are you doing!?" I yell.

"You think that we can't punish you for everything you did? Cause we sure can."

I breathe heavily, "Let go of me." I demand.

"Stop it." He responds.

"Enough." Enzo adds.

"Seriously? You think-" Theo cuts me off.

"Shut up. I'm done playing nice. Turn your emotions back on, Alice, or so help me Merlin... I will give you something to be sad about."

Mattheo nervously walks forward. "Theo..." he tries to calm him down.

"Don't 'Theo' me." He looks at Mattheo. "She wants to act like this? Fine. I'll take her out of it." He angrily looks at me, rage filling his body.

"Stop it, Theo." I feel the tears coming back. I can't deal with this.

"Alice, why can't you deal with me being mad sometimes?! What? Do you want me to stay quiet all the time and go hurt myself to get it out!?" My mouth agapes. I don't cry, the tears get stuck in my eyes. I feel my heart pounding in my chest as my hands start to shake uncontrollably. I don't speak a word; there is nothing more to say.

"You're ruining my life!" He shouts.

I shake my head slowly as the tears begin to fall. "I hope you don't think that shit's fair." I speak quietly, almost whispering. "I mean," a small chuckle escapes my mouth. I don't know if it's because of how ridiculous this whole thing is or because I don't know what else to do, "I fucked up, I know that, but Merlin! I deserved a better goodbye from you, Theo." I cry quietly.

"You don't deserve anything from me." He sternly speaks.

"You... you were my best friend... for years. I know you, and I know you don't actually mean that." The word hisses in my brain like a snake; 'were'.

"You don't know me! You have no idea of the pain that runs through my veins!" He yells.

"But we both know I do." I talk calmly.

"Bloody hell, I fucking hate you, Jones!"

"And I!...," I shout, then breathe deeply, "wish you'd understand that... I hate me too. I hate what I said, I hate what I did. I'd give anything to not be me." I sob, "but I'm trying to get better. I just wish you were there to see it."

He shakes his head slowly, "You don't deserve me being there." In a moment, all of my sadness turns into rage. I begin shaking with anger, a combination of rage and unsettled pain.

"Oh, what? You think you're that much better than me? You know, Theo, I stopped saying you were my best friend just now, after we fought. But you stopped being my friend at the beginning of the year, when we slept together. Once you got what you wanted you stopped caring for me. I guess our friendship was a lie, because when you got what you wanted it stopped. I mean, you said you'll always be there for me all the time. You said you'll always be there for me all the time! And you left me when I needed you!" I snap. And as my heart pounds, silence fills the air.

Then, the boy with the perfectly blue eyes I used to always love staring at sighs, "Alice," he says, "you are all the things that are wrong with you. It's not the sex, or alcohol, or any of the shitty things that happened to you at Hogwarts, or when you were a kid. It's you."