And then I met You ➳ n.h

Emotionless Alien

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I got back to where the rest of the boys were. They were all looking way better than half an hour ago without doubt. Their clothes were neat and clean, their hair no longer looked like bed hair, and even their faces looked more awake and happy; does that make sense?

I walked in and sat down on the sofa next to Harry.

"How'd it go? Are you finally Mrs.Horan once again?" He asked.

I remained quiet and stared at the dirty floor, I think that answered them all. None of them said anything from that point on, they just walked over me and gave me a tight group hug.

"One Direction! You guys are up next. Get your mics and hurry down here." Said one of the stage managers.

"Coming!" They all yelled, synchronized- as always. It's still creepy sometimes.

As they got up to leave, Louis looked back at me.

"But, you're not crying your heart out. That means there's still hope left in you.." He mentioned.

I shrugged my shoulders as he gave me a small pat on the back.

"Aye that's true. We've known you for a year already and we've never seen a tear roll down your cheeks, not even with everything that has been going on." Stated Liam from across the room.

"I might be an alien with no emotions, you guys will never know." I said.

I wasn't sure if I was attempting to be funny so that the tension in the room would disappear or because I knew that if we continued to talk about this whole thing I would begin to cry.

"Oh careful. Her humor is back, let's leave before she uses it against us to relieve her emotions." Harry said with a scared tone of voice.

That bastard.

"Oh and by the way, you might want to open the red envelope now. Just saying." Harry added.

Niall had somehow managed to get into the audio room without any one of us noticing. The guys finally left to the tiny audio room where the artists would wait before it was their turn to perform. They we're ready to go on stage any minute now.

Unfortunately, I wasn't allowed to leave. Joe was my ride home and he had to be more focused now that the guys were about to perform. The security guard on the door still believed that I was actually in charge of keeping order among those 5 lads, so she wouldn't let me leave either. Apparently, One Direction was my responsibility and I was theirs, walking out of here was not an option. The only option I did have was to stay on the side of the stage where I couldn't be seen and watch the boys perform. After that I was free to leave and continue with my miserable life.

Going back to what Louis and Liam said, I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but I've never been the type of girl that cries over a boy -or over anything in general. I've always had myself set to be the strongest girl on earth and crying would not get me anywhere near that. However, pretending to be strong all the time really sucks. It's difficult, it's boring, and simply impossible. Everyone breaks down sooner or later no matter how self confident they are. Even an emotionless robot could cry once in a while- or an alien with no emotions like me.

I know that what just happened was the perfect example of a reason why the strongest person on earth would cry. Why hadn't I? Well, to begin with, what Niall told me caught me by surprise, I wasn't sure what to expect before talking to him but surely that wasn't it. So I hadn't been able to fully process his words, until now.

As I saw him walk into stage along with the other boys, I finally understood what had really happened a few minutes ago.
He was smiling and waving to the loud crowd -oh how I love that smile- but he didn't look truly happy. It seemed like he didn't mean that smile, it was fake. He was concerned and somewhat still frustrated. Great, I ruined tonight's performance. Honestly, a sad or mad singer onstage can really kill the audience's mood.

But I know Niall and I know the love he has for all the fans out there, he won't let a bad thing get on his way of giving them the night of their lives.
I saw how he moved across the stage and how easily he could affect the emotions of any girl-and even guys.

Yeah, he tends to have incredible effects on people.

I remembered the incident with that stupid girl from my speech class. What she said bothered me so much that I had punched her. I don't usually do that. I had more breakdowns in this past year than in my entire life. Being away from Niall did terrible things to me. That's why I didn't fight against coming down here. I didn't come just to 'talk' and get closure. That's a lie full of poop! I came here because I unconsciously wanted him back into my life. As much as I refuse to admit it, I want him and I know I won't survive another day away from him without losing my sanity.

Love is powerful, it can drive people crazy.

I want Niall back. I want to be able to all him my boyfriend again without it being a lie. I want the media to go crazy because some peasant girl made the Blonde member from One Direction fall in love. And most importantly, I want to be that peasant girl! I want to go back to just laying on the couch watching him compose new songs then support him when those songs are released and become top hits.

I want us back.

But no.

That won't happen.

I lost Niall.

And I also lost my 'no crying' streak because after thinking about all of this and processing every detail of this afternoon, I let down my strong girl cover and began to cry.

It was the first time I ever cried for a boy.