Rare / Robert Baratheon / Rieka Stark

13. Mr Fancy Pants

The Hand of the King's tournament was loud and hot. So hot. Rieka felt herself perspiring already. She fanned herself with her hand as she looked for her father. She found robert waving her over instead. Meanwhile Petyr poor petyr who had been rejected via the king turned his sights on sansa instead. An easier target from the looks of it. He saw Sansa looking at Joffrey who hid his face from her.

"Lover's quarrel?" Petyr remarked coming up to Sansa.

"I'm sorry. Do I...?" Sansa looked him over confused.

"Sansa dear, this is Lord Baelish. He's known as..." Mordone began.

"An old friend of the family. I've known your mother a long long time." Petyr offered. "Lady rieka i have been meaning to properly introduce myself."

"Nice to meet you Petyr sorry about... my lies." She whispered

"Oh i would have gladly married you," petyr assured. "I enjoyed our correspondence throughly."

"Me as well. Thank you for all the gifts and music too. It was really lovely." Rieka added.

"Why do they call you Littlefinger?" Arya interrupted.  

"Arya!" Sansa declared, Arya shrugged.

"Don't be rude!" Mordane agreed.

"No, it's quite all right. When I was a child I was very small and I come from a little spit of land called The Fingers, so you see, it's an exceedingly clever nickname." Petyr explained and Arya wasn't impressed.

"I've been sitting here for days! Start the damn joust already!" Robert demanded.

"Excuse me." Rieka whispered heading off. "Your grace." She curstied before robert.

"Come here." He reached out a hand Joffrey didnt pay them any attention. Rieka stepped up onto the platform glancing around for her father.

"What did little fonger want?" Robert questioned

"To meet me formally. I have been busy and otherwise preoccupied to have met my once betrothed." Rieka informed him casually. His gaze focused on her lips. "Robert." She whispered. "Do you think you can keep your hands off me if I stay up here?"

"It will certainly be a challenge." Robert agreed as the men got into places. "But I love a challenge."

" Gods, who is that?"

"Ser Gregor Clegane. They call him the Mountain. The Hound's older brother." Petyr answered.

"Where is your father?" Robert questioned glancing around. "This tourney is for him."

"He's not one for shows." Rieka countered.

"You came."

"You invited me." Rieka agreed.

"If i invite you into my bed will you come there too?"

Cum or come, rieka thought but she bit her tongue keeping her dirty mind at bay.

⚔️

"Heavens ned I need a larger cock plate." Robert remarked. Rieka scrunched up her face. "It's growing."

"Robert, not in front of my daughter."

Your daughter is the reason my pants are too tight, Robert wanted to countered, Rieka blushed turning her cheek, he wouldnt embarrass her as such. Ned might just kill him for it.

"Go find the cock plate stretcher, now!" Robert demanded and Lancel ran out of the tent.

"The cock plate stretcher?" Ned questioned.

"How long before he figures it out?" Robert laughed out.

"Maybe you should have one invented." Ned offered.

"All right, all right, dont be jealous that I'm packing and you are limp." Robert countered.

"Robert!" Ned demanded. "Rieka is a lady, please," he begged. Robert winked back at her.

"You watch me out there. I still know how to point a lance." Robert remarked.

"You have no business jousting. Leave that for the young men."

"Why? Because I'm king? Piss on that. I want to hit somebody!" Robert declared. "You want to hit somebody rieka?"

"is your son an option?" Rieka questioned as Ned begged, dont answer that- DONT SAY THAT! But Robert laughed out.

"We get out there together then." Robert agreed.

"And who's going to hit you back?" Ned countered.

"Anybody who can. And the last man in his saddle... will be you!" Robert decided.

"There's not a man in the Seven Kingdoms would risk hurting you." Ned corrected.

" Are you telling me those cowards would let me win?" Robert pondered.

"Aye." Ned agreed without hesitation.

"... Drink." Robert insisted

"I'm not thirsty." Ned corrected. Rieka took the bottle.

"Drink, follow your daughters lead and drink! Your King commands it. Gods! I want to compete. I still got it ned. We could show these greens who still has it." Robert declared.  "Or what about rieka? One on one?"

"I would like that." Rieka agreed. Ned chuckled.

"Careful. Shes a wild one." Ned warned.

"Most women are." Robert agreed locking eyes with her. She felt compelled and unable to look away.

"Your squire... A Lannister boy?" Ned questioned.

"Hmm... A bloody idiot... But Cersei insisted. I have Jon Arryn to thank for her. "Cersei Lannister will make a good match", he told me." Robert barked. "You'll need her father on your side." He went on "I thought being King meant I could do whatever I wanted. Enough of this! Let's go watch 'em ride. At least I can smell someone else's blood."

"Robert used to wear his enemies blood like perfume." Ned told rieka.

"Now hes mr fancy pants and uses really perfumes." Rieka agreed.

"Mr fancy pants with the big thick cock to you little lady." Robert countered.