Started drinking to try and forget you. Started waking up and thinking I was still with you. Started calling you while I was wasted. Leaving voicemails, both begging you to come back and screaming at you for the way my world crashed. My mom is begging me to pick up walking, but I can only pick up the bottle. I can't spend one more night thinking of all we could've been. The liquor may not cancel out the thoughts, but it certainly makes them quieter. I once screamed at you. I'd be fine if you left. Then that night, I felt your head on my chest. I whispered in your ear, that my world would collapse if you weren't here. I can't tell if this is some sort of a sick test. But trust me when I say, there's nothing more humiliating than crying on the bathroom floor and begging you to come back. There's nothing more dehumanizing than hearing your voice say "I've felt nothing since I left". But I'd do it all again. I'd humiliate myself, I'd dehumanize myself. If it meant you'd come back.
YOU ARE READING
The live's I've lived
PoetryThis is a collection of poems and pieces of writing. That I have written over the last 2 years of my life. I've never been one to actually live. To take the risk. A lot of the things I have written are about things that have happened in my head. Or...
