I need to talk to somebody for my mental and I need to figure out how to gain some weight back. Cause babyyyy I look unwell. 😂
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September 12, 2023 12:30 PM
"Baby what's wrong" Israel asked looking over at me.
"Nothing, I'm fine Love" I said scrolling on my phone.
"Mamas" He said sitting up staring at me.
"Yes" I asked glancing up at him.
"I'm trying to talk to you, can you put the phone down please" He softly asked. I sat me phone down and played with my nails.
"I'm fine Baby" I told him looking up at him.
"Stop lying to me Passion" He said moving closer to me. "Tell me what's bothering you" He said tilting his head.
"Are you sure you want to be with me, I'm not saying I don't want to be with you. I just... do you think we're moving to fast? Do you think the kids felt preasured to call me Mom? What if I do something wrong and they stop loving me" I rambled wiping a tear before it fell. "I hate to say it out loud, but I don't want to be alone again. I'm scared I'll ruin our family" I shivered putting my hand over my face.
"Baby where is this coming from? We love you, we're not going nowhere" He said pulling me into his arms. "Where did these thoughts come from Babe" He whispered rubbing my back.
"I had a dream... well a nightmare" I sniffled keeping my face in his chest.
"What happened in your dream Lovely" He asked laying his head on mine.
"You broke up with me and you were really mean about it" I sighed closing my eyes. "You said you weren't interested nor attracted to me anymore and other things I don't want to say. You said that the kids weren't mine and cut contact... it's a lot I don't want to talk about it, I was just gonna push it to the back of my mind" I mumbled biting the inside of my jaw.
"Bae that's not me, that's not real. I Israel Josiah Knight LOVE you Noelle Passion Mackay. I eat, sleep, and breath Noelle. I'm more than interested and attracted to you, I'm obsessed with you Mamas. OUR kids LOVE you they weren't pressured, I didn't even know they were asking to call you Mama that night" He said moving my hair out of my face kissing my head.
"Okay" I deeply sighed before yawning. "I'm sorry" I mumbled closing my eyes.
"For what? You didn't do anything Baby" He said rubbing my back.
