Spy School Oneshot Collection

Detergent

Before Catherine and Alexander got divorced.

"Did you pick up laundry detergent?" Catherine asked Alexander.

"Should I have?"

"It was on the list," Catherine said.

"Right!" Alexander said, like he was suddenly remembering. "Well, you didn't specify what brand, so I just didn't want to accidentally get the wrong one."

"Really?" Catherine asked, not believing him one bit.

"I'll go to the store right now," Alexander said. "I'll even do the laundry."

"Do you know how to do the laundry?"

"Of course," Alexander said. "I did my own laundry plenty in college."

"And what about after that?"

"Well, it turns out that trying to dry clean things by yourself isn't the greatest idea. But in college, back before I wore suits all the time like a dignified spy, I managed my laundry largely without incident. I only flooded the laundry room in my dorm twice."

"Only?" Catherine asked.

"No one else in my dorm was very good at laundry either," Alexander said. "People even blew up washing machines a couple of times."

"Oh, were explosives also common there?"

"I may have been very vaguely indirectly responsible for providing the explosive material in some if those cases," Alexander said. "But that's not the point. The point is that my laundry skills could have been much worse."

"It doesn't really matter how good your laundry skills are since you have never done the laundry," Catherine said.

"But I will do it today," Alexander said.

"And then I'll be doing it again tomorrow?"

"Not if you don't want to."

"Somehow I doubt that," Catherine said.

"When have I ever lied to you?" Alexander asked.

"Just go pick up the detergent."

"I will pick up tons of detergent because it looks like I will be doing tons of laundry."

"And that will be great if that's true," Catherine said.

"It is!" Alexander yelled back as he went out to start the car.

Trixie, who had been watching this whole conversation, looked at Catherine and said, "I don't really want Dad messing up the laundry."

"It'll be ok," Catherine said. "I'll be watching him. But let's just let him think he's helping."

"Why?"

"Because I'm a little busy at the moment, and don't want to deal with the paperwork yet," Catherine said.

"What paperwork?" Trixie asked.

"Go ask your sister."