Crying isn't an option in his life. Koa knows this, he didn't cry while he was away, he didn't cry when she came out although he was close. He didn't cry. There was no point. He's been out for a while but there's something in the back of his mind that tells him he can't cry and he can't talk about anything.
Who would care anyway? His answer, No one. No one cares enough for that. For him. The care tends to go to Kin. Their father doesn't count. He doesn't count because he helped put the don't cry and you don't tell people voice that lives in the back of his mind.
He's been 'free' for a week maybe two. He doesn't know what to do, he feels like he should feel something he's numb, afraid and sad but he can't express any of what he feels. He struggles. By the end of most days he's exhausted and this day was no different.
Kin refuses to let him stay in a room by himself, fae chosen faerself to be the one that stays with him. Which he doesn't mind but he just wants to be alone at least once. He does understand why kin doesn't want him to be alone. Koa was in the room before kin as fae were talking to ax as normal. That's when it happens he's alone in the room and the tears start. Why the hell is he crying? He can't breathe and he's crying.
He doesn't know how long he's been alone in the room. He's lying on his bed not facing the door, the tears turned silent. He hears the door open and kin saying bye to ax, the door close. Koa doesn't move, he's done something he wasn't meant to do.
They do not talk. Kin might know he cried but fae does not speak.
