Loving, Mr Waters

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

THANDO
I'm on the floor instantly as I wrap my arms around Matthew as he cries. I've never in my life witnessed a man crying this much and seeing him so vulnerable is so humbling and a gift. A gift because it's very rare to find a boy and grown man allowing himself to cry let alone to cry in front of his loved one. The fact that he didn't run away and pretend to be fine when he isn't is something I'm grateful for cause I really don't know how I would have handled it.
I listen to him cry, allowing him the safe space to shed away his tears and I can't help crying as well. I cry for Trey, the sweetest little guy who is so incredible thanks to his father, I cry for Matthew and for all the pain he had to go through this past seven years all on his own. Never in my life had I disliked someone as much as I dislike Miranda. I just hope we never cross paths because so help me God, I won't hesitate to tell her exactly what I think of her.
"I'm sorry." Matthew sniffle next to me as he wipes his eyes and I frown when I hear his apology.
"What for?" I ask unsure of what he's apologizing for.
"For crying this much out of the blue. And I'm sure you're probably tired from your trip so I'll go." He says attempting to stand up but I stop him.
"Matthew, I want you to always know that you can be your true self with me." I tell him kissing his forehead. "You never have to hide your emotions from me. I'm always here to listen to you no matter what time and you don't ever have to pretend whenever you're me." I tell him wanting my words to sink in.
"Thank you baby." He kisses me then looks at me. "I know you have some questions so ask away."
I have tons of questions but the most important one is on the tip of my tongue and I don't know if it's appropriate to ask him.
"Anything?" I eye him.
"Anything." He assures me nodding his head.
"Please if I'm overstepping feel free to tell me." I tell him nervously but he nods again looking at me as if he knows what I'm about to ask him.
"Okay." I huff playing with my hands to ease the nerves. "Have you ever done a DNA to confirm if Trey is really your son?" I blurt out the words looking anywhere but him. The room fall silence as I wait for him to answer but he doesn't which forces me to look at him and when I do I shiver from the look he's giving me.
"I'm so sorry that was really inappropriate." I say feeling super stupid for not keeping my mouth shut when needed.
Oh Thando, when will you learn to keep your mouth shut?
"I did." He finally says after what feels like years.
"Right, okay then." I bite my bottom lip stopping myself from asking more questions.
"And I found out that he's not biologically mine." He says the words so low I might have missed them if I wasn't paying attention. My lips open but words fail me as I stare at him.
What the fuck?
So Trey is not Matthews biological son?
"But make no mistake Thando, Trey is my son no matter what a piece of paper says. No one and I mean absolute no one can ever take him away from me or convince me that I am not his father." He tells me meaning every word and something shifts in his eyes and I conclude that it's a bit of fear.
Fear of anyone taking Trey away from him. I suppose Miranda's visit reminded him of his past and everything he went through.
"Does Miranda know this?"
"I doubt she knows and I have no interest of telling her."
"Matthew," I take his hand in my mine staring in his eyes. "You're the strongest, courageous, and have the most beautiful soul. Not many people can do what you've done and do. Trey is so blessed to have a father like you and I know he knows that too. And yes you're right, you're his father in every sense and if it ever comes to the point where other's disagrees I promise to fight with you side by side." I vow.
This man, has taken such responsibilities with open arms and love. Everyday when I think I love him more he goes and make me fall more in love with him.
"I don't know what I did to deserve you but I'm beyond grateful. You have no idea how much your words just healed me. I didn't know how much I needed to hear those words until you said them." He tells me.
I love this man with everything in me and I pray to God he feels the same way.
"Does your family know? Or anyone for that matter?" I ask him and he shakes his head.
"No one knows. I never told anyone. This is one of the secrets I'll take to the grave with me." He tells me and to say I'm shocked is underrated.
"So...only I know?" My eyes snap to his which are already on mine and he nods. "And you trust me enough with this information?"
"For some reason I trust you more than anyone in this world." He says and dear Lord I'm honored .
"I promise to take this secret to the grave with me as well." I promise meaning word to word.
"Trey can never find out."
"Never." I tell him as we stand up and kiss. This kiss is not sexual, this kiss signifies something promising between us.
"I've been thinking." Matthew says as he plays with my cheeks.
"Yeah?"
"I think it's time Trey knows about us."
Say what?
Oh. My. God!!!!
This is good right? This means he feels secure in our relationship enough to introduce me to his son as his girlfriend.
This mean he loves me, right?
"Babe?"
"Are you sure?" I blurt out immediately regretting my words.
"Yes. I don't want us to keep sneaking around like kids forever. I want you to be able to come visit and do sleepovers at my house without sneaking around." He smiles that boyish smile of his that I'm sure has girls handing out numbers without him asking.
"I'd like that." I smile widely.
"We start with Trey then we tell our family."
"Yes." I answer pulling away happy. "Let me make us something to eat." I say already leading him to the kitchen then open the fridge and see that I haven't yet bought grocery. "Ugh, I forgot I haven't done any shopping."
"That's alright. I'll have something at work. How about we go and buy your groceries together?"
"I'd love that but I'm really tired and I have to go through work. I'll order something and buy everything tomorrow after work."
"Make sure you get something right away, please."
"When I wake up." I argue.
"Okay. Tomorrow you're having dinner with Trey and me at my place."
"Wow. Okay." I clear my throat shocked. "We're really doing this then?"
"If you're not sure we can wait a bit." Matthew says eyeing me suspiciously.
Good God, he must think I'm having second thoughts about us.
"I want. I'm just nervous that's all."
"There's nothing to be nervous about. I promise we will be fine."
"Okay."
"Good. Be at my house at six."
"Yes sir."
He chuckles then kiss me one more time before he leaves. I tidy up a bit about to go upstairs when my doorbell rings. I open the door and find plenty of groceries on my doorstep and note. After taking everything and put it in the kitchen I read the note blushing.

I couldn't let you sleep in a home with no food. Sorry if I crossed the line but in my defense you offered me food so why not I do the same thing?
xo: The white container has your favorite food which I hope soften your heart and makes you less angry at me.
I can't wait to see you tomorrow baby.
Yours: Matthew

I blush reading Matthew's note and find the container which consists of food and eat the whole bowl right away before putting everything in it's place. I take my phone replying to my moms endless texts, my friends and text my man.
Me: Thank you baby for the food. Let this be the first and the last time you shop the whole grocery store for me though. Can't wait to see you and Trey tomorrow.
I hit send then go to sleep. That afternoon I dream of Trey not accepting me as his father's girlfriend. Dream or not I'm shaking in my boots and I just hope that's not the case when we tell him about us.