Hopeless - A Powerless Fanfiction

Paedyn

I didn't want to run. I didn't want to leave him. I didn't want any of this. The only thing I truly want is him, Kai. But I can't have him, not right now, maybe not ever. The thought threatens my eyes to tear up. I have to be strong for me, for him, for all of Ilya.

I keep running and running and running, I only stop when I reach familiar territory, Loot. My old home. Adena's home. Before everything went to ruins.

At this time Loot is empty, everyone is sound asleep. 

Perfect, there's no one to see me. No one to catch me.

Well, no one except sleep deprivation, tiredness and exhaustion. Knowing this, I purge ahead anyway, hoping my rush of adrenaline will keep me going for a while longer. 

All I have to do now is get to the scorches, get to Dor and then from there, to Izram. Easier said than done, but if I could get to Dor before, I can do it again... I just need more rest, then I'll be able to journey all the way there.

But before that... I have to make one more stop. The fort. My home. Adena's home. Our home. I found myself in a slum alley, the slum alley me and Adena built our home in. The fort, despite the bad conditions, despite how bad it was to live in, despite all the challenges we faced, the fort was home, nothing could ever replace it. It would forever be my home. Memories of Adena flood my thoughts, if only she were still here... 

But she isn't, is she? And whose fault is that? Mine. Mine. And mine. I could've saved her, if only I had been quicker, I can't do anything now. I will forever relive the nightmare which occurred during the purging trials, I shall never forget how I could've saved her yet let her die right in front of me. I couldn't even fulfill her last promise. But I can make another promise to her, to Adena, this time it won't be meaningless, this time I will follow it through. I promise you, Adena, I promise you that I shall avenge you. When I get my hands on Blair Archer, I shall give her torture she never thought possible. 

I don't remember when I started crying, but once I started, I couldn't stop. The tears kept rolling down my cheeks. I curl up on one of the makeshift beds I used to sleep on in the Fort. I curl up and cry my heart out. All the tears I kept back, I let them roll down my cheeks, I let them escape, I let myself mourn for Adena. Finally, after so long I truly mourn for her, for everything, for everyone. For my father. For Adena. Even for the guards and bandits I killed.

I mourn all of them until my eyes slowly close and darkness consumes me, and I drift off to another world. A world where I'm happy. A world where Adena lives. A perfect world.

A temporary world, that I shall eventually awaken from to face the nightmares of the real world.