Hopeless - A Powerless Fanfiction

Paedyn

I hear footsteps coming into the room, I quickly close my eyes, and slow my breathing down, in an attempt to fake unconsciousness. There's a chance I can find out where I am if I eavesdrop on our kidnappers. 

When the footsteps come to a halt, I hear an audible gasp, it filled the whole room. Then I hear a few muffled words, which I can't fully hear, but the meaning is clear, someone was asking about what to do with us.

"I'll decide that you can go back to your post now, I'll inform you of my next steps shortly, thank you for your assistance" I almost gasped when I heard the voice. It belonged to him. To the enforcer. To Kai. He sounded different though. His voice was cold and icy, not like when he had helped me escape, his voice had been soft and warm then. He was wearing one of his many masks right now. 

I snapped my thoughts away from the memory of him pressing me against the wall, kissing me like it might be the last time we see each other. God I really wanted to open my eyes, to see him, to take him, to breathe him in. But I couldn't. Not yet. 

"Yes sir, if there's anything you need, I'll be at my post" another voice replied, I assume it belonged to a guard, to Kai's dismissal. I then hear the man walk away, his footsteps getting fainter with every step he makes, till they're no longer audible.

Since my eyes are rendered useless, I fully depend on my ears, and based off of them there's only me, Mak and Kai in the room, but I'm not taking any chances, so I keep my eyes shut. No one has noticed I'm awake yet, so I should be fine.

Then I hear a low chuckle from the other end of the room. 

"Darling, I know you're awake" he says in a low husky voice.

He couldn't possibly know I'm awake, could he? My eyes are shut, my breathing has slowed, and my body is completely still. 

I feel his fingers on my chin, as he tugs my face upwards, and my eyes fly open in surprise.

How the Hell was he that close to me? He can't have been that silent. I thought he was on the other side of the room. 

Our eyes collide so fast, I can barely stifle a gasp. God. Those stormy gray eyes, they always get me staring in awe. Staring like an idiot. Those damn eyes. Whenever I look into those stormy gray eyes, I shatter. Every damn time. I shatter. I suffocate. I struggle for breath. 

His eyes search mine, for what, I'm not sure. But he seems satisfied within a few moments, he found whatever he was looking for. 

"Why didn't you run when I told you to? Pae, do you not trust me?" 

If I didn't know better, I'd have thought he was joking. 

But I do know better.

I can see it in his eyes. He's hurt. I'm one of the only people he trusts, one of the only people he loves. He doesn't want it to be unrequited love. He wants to know that I truly feel the same way about him. He needs to know I feel the same way about him. I've been keeping my feelings from him for too long.

"Damnit...Kai if I had known that's what you'd have thought I wouldn't have come back here. Kai, I came back here because..." I pause, the thought of Adena making me wince once more, will I ever get used to the memory? Or will it forever plague my nightmares? "Because I needed to grieve for her...I never got a proper chance to do so before, I just needed to..."

His eyes widen, and he shakes his head in concern. 

"Pae, it wasn't your fault...you know that right?" 

 "I know it wasn't my fault... but it doesn't stop me from feeling like it was" 

He nods in understanding and pulls me into a warm embrace, he'd killed many lives, directly and indirectly, for something he thought to be true, for a non-existent cause. He might be the only person in all of Ilya who understands how I feel. 

"What. The. Hell"

Both Kai and I, turn our heads in anticipation of a guard, but the words hadn't escaped from an elite guard.

They had come from Makoto.