𝙍𝘼𝘿𝙄𝘼𝙉𝘾𝙀 || 𝖶𝖨𝖭𝖣 𝖡𝖱𝖤𝖠𝖪𝖤𝖱 𝖥𝖠𝖭𝖥𝖨𝖢

20 - Fear of Loneliness

A/N: Back to chap 20, I don't think y'all enjoyed the special chap that much-

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'What?'

'Did I hear that correctly?'

It feels like my heart stopped beating. I could hear something ringing in my ears..it's the only thing I could hear. My body feels so heavy, like something is keeping me from moving. I didn't realize I stopped breathing for a second before Tsubaki held my shoulders.

I couldn't think of anything else..I'm scared..my chest feels tight..

'I already made some friends..they'll disappear soon..'

'They'll hate me..'

'They'll kick me out..'

'The whole town might hate me for deceiving them..'

'Haru will get sad..'

'I'll end up leaving him alone..'

'I don't want to leave him alone..'

'I don't want to go-'

"Hey..are you okay? I'm sorry did that startle you?" My lungs gasped for air, I looked down at my feet as I held my chest. I could feel my arms tremble, no. My whole body is trembling..

"P-please....pl-please don't t-tell anyone e-else..I beg you..I don't w-want to-" My lips trembled as I felt tears roll down my face. It felt like the world was spinning. I felt Tsubaki's embrace and they held me in their arms gently.

"Breathe Sakura..calm down..I won't tell anyone..it looked like you wanted to keep it a secret so I didn't ask earlier..I'm not gonna tell anyone..I promise"

'But promises are meant to be broken at some point'

I closed my eyes tightly to stop my eyes from letting out anymore tears, my face was pressed against Tsubaki's chest. 'This is pathetic..showing my weak side like this'

"You have your reasons and I won't judge you for that..your brother's doing a great job at keeping it a secret as well..seems like you two already planned it out-"

"How did you know?" My voice was stern and my fists clenched tightly together. I wanted to push Tsubaki away but my arms felt weak..still trembling.

"My radar"

'...radar?' Tsubaki slowly lets go of me and held my hands gently to keep me from falling. They smiled gently at me before talking again.

"I just felt it. The moment I saw you, my guts told me you were a girl. I've been dressing up like this for a while now, I can easily tell by looking at people" 'Oh..'

"You're not going to snitch on us r-right..?" My voice quietly lets out as I looked up to meet Tsubaki's eyes. 'Such kind and beautiful eyes..'

"Of course not..I know how it feels to hide what you really are..I'll help you out as much as I can okay? I won't force you to tell me your reasons, you can tell me whenever you are ready or even not at all, I'll still help. Don't sweat it...dry your tears now, we don't want the others to see right?" Tsubaki said as they wiped my tears away with their thumb.